# Afraid for my children **URL:** \ **Category:** Divorce and Separation Answers\ **Created:** [February 15, 2007, 4:24pm UTC](https://forum.rosen.com/t/afraid-for-my-children/4208 "2007-02-15T16:24:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 6\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![blondie1976](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b487fb/32.png) [@blondie1976](https://forum.rosen.com/u/blondie1976)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2007, 4:24pm UTC](https://forum.rosen.com/t/afraid-for-my-children/4208/1 "2007-02-15T16:24:08Z")
I don’t know about the younger one, but I know the older one can refuse visitation (taking you live in NC), but has to tell the judge why he doesn’t like going over there. That might be the start of your case. Sorry I am not much help in your situation. You might be able to talk to legal aid too My son is younger than both of yours and my ex has some mental issues - he strangled me and abused and still abuses my 4 yr old. Not much can be done until I can get another attorney. ---
**Author:** ![JanetFritts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d2c977/32.png) [@JanetFritts](https://forum.rosen.com/u/JanetFritts)\ **Post date:** [March 7, 2007, 7:24pm UTC](https://forum.rosen.com/t/afraid-for-my-children/4208/2 "2007-03-07T19:24:02Z")
Dear baseballmom: Greetings. Do you have a separation agreement or court order for custody? Th Janet L. Fritts Attorney with Rosen Law Firm 4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500 Raleigh, North Carolina 27607 919.787.6668 main phone 919.256.1665 direct fax 301 McCullough Drive Suite 510 Charlotte, North Carolina 28262 704.644.2831 main voice 704.307.4595 main fax 1829 East Franklin Street, Bldg 600 Chapel Hill, NC 27514 919.321.0780 main phone 919.787.6668 main fax > **[North Carolina Divorce Law - Legal Answers and Info](https://www.rosen.com/)** > > The best resource for divorce in NC. Find accurate, legal, family law advice from attorneys practicing in Raleigh, Durham, Cary, and Chapel Hill. The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action. ---
**Author:** ![baseballmom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e19b73/32.png) [@baseballmom](https://forum.rosen.com/u/baseballmom)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2007, 1:54pm UTC](https://forum.rosen.com/t/afraid-for-my-children/4208/3 "2007-03-15T13:54:37Z")
Yes. My agreement states that we have joint custody with my having primary. ---
**Author:** ![FATHERDORIGHT](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a8b319/32.png) [@FATHERDORIGHT](https://forum.rosen.com/u/FATHERDORIGHT)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2007, 7:26am UTC](https://forum.rosen.com/t/afraid-for-my-children/4208/4 "2007-03-21T07:26:29Z")
Since I’m having a problem posting a new topic I’ll post it in yours, How long does it takes for Child Support Enforcement to enforce payment on the defendant, the order was given in Sept 06 and I haven’t recieved a payment yet and the enforcement agency has had all documentation since Sept 06. this is Durham Count I’m talking about. ---
**Author:** ![JanetFritts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d2c977/32.png) [@JanetFritts](https://forum.rosen.com/u/JanetFritts)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2007, 9:01pm UTC](https://forum.rosen.com/t/afraid-for-my-children/4208/5 "2007-04-10T21:01:23Z")
Dear baseballmom: Greetings. Yes, you can tell him that, but you are setting yourself up for a breach of contract action. Of course, he may have violated first and you have a good reason, but a violation is a violation. You are better off filing a custody action. Good luck. Janet L. Fritts Attorney with Rosen Law Firm 4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500 Raleigh, North Carolina 27607 919.787.6668 main phone 919.256.1665 direct fax 301 McCullough Drive Suite 510 Charlotte, North Carolina 28262 704.644.2831 main voice 704.307.4595 main fax 1829 East Franklin Street, Bldg 600 Chapel Hill, NC 27514 919.321.0780 main phone 919.787.6668 main fax > **[North Carolina Divorce Law - Legal Answers and Info](https://www.rosen.com/)** > > The best resource for divorce in NC. Find accurate, legal, family law advice from attorneys practicing in Raleigh, Durham, Cary, and Chapel Hill. The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action. ---
**Author:** ![baseballmom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e19b73/32.png) [@baseballmom](https://forum.rosen.com/u/baseballmom)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2007, 11:54am UTC](https://forum.rosen.com/t/afraid-for-my-children/4208/6 "2007-02-15T11:54:29Z")
I share custody of my two boys ages 6 and 14 with my X-husband. I am the primary caregiver. The boys have been spending 3 nights per week with their father for the past couple of years. The 14year old hates staying with his dad and will do anything to avoid going over there. He is disgusted with his father and the way he is. The 6 year old loves going over there because lets him run wild, stay up later than a 6 year old should, and he gets to eat Cheetos for dinner! Here is the main problem and why I divorced him. Their dad is diagnosed bipolar and is on anti-psychotic types of medication for that, he also has severe back pain and takes large amounts of methadone for that, and and he takes tranquilizers for sleep problems. (He is a walking pill-bottle!) On top of all of the drugs he takes, he drinks fairly large amounts of alcohol on a daily basis. He does all of this while he has the children are in his care. The 14 year old says he passes out every night and that there is a gun in the house not locked up. During the 10 years that their father and I were together he was in at least 6 rehab facilities for alcohol and prescription drug abuse. He had straightened up for awhile but is now back to his old ways. He manages to keep his a job at the USPS and gets by in life keeping to himself for the most part. My question… Without paying an arm and a leg for an attorney, what recourse do I have? Can I tell him he can’t have the kids until he straightens up? How do I prove what he is doing over there? I am very worried about the safety of my children while in his care.