Do I have to accept change in Child Support?

My child support Consent Order has been on file over two years. This order was based on worksheet B because we have a 223/142 night split where mom has 223, dad 142 nights. The Consent Order shows dad paying all insurance, all childcare, plus 129 per month.
Dad was terminated with cause from his job on Sept 3rd 2008, and has kept his obligation up until this month. He has today 4/1 filed in Iredell County (where mom lives) to have the child support changed. He requests that mom take on all insurance costs, all daycare costs, and according to his calculations based on mom’s income (dad only has unemployment) an additional $500 per month paid to him for his shared-custody nights.
As the mom, do I have any clear-cut opportunity to refuse this based on any of the following (or something else):
(1) he was terminated with cause (not laid off)
(2) he has luxury expenditures that he continues to make as a choice, and in order to keep paying those, he’s coming to me to take over the child costs (a normal married family would have to liquidate their luxuries if their child’s welfare was at stake)
It really angers me that he’ll be able to remain comfortably unemployed longer if he forces me to shoulder his childcare burden.
(3) Is there any way I can just take on the out-of-pocekt costs of the insurance and daycare, but not have to pay him the childcare nights amount?
(4) I suppose I could go for sole custody, but I don’t really want to deprive him of his daughter, AND I truely need the childcare assistance. Is there a benefit to having sole custody for me?

Thanks for your advice.

I would have this case heard by a judge. You have a good argument that he has lost his job in bad faith and that the court should impute income to him. I do not recommend changing custody if you believe the current arrangement is in your child’s best interests.