bjkmom,
as an investigator I find your situation appalling. It is unjust and unseemly that DSS would be involved simply becouse your son was home during the crime. To take six months to clear you of any wrong doing is also unacceptable, the primary investigator should have done that right away. Have you taken any measures to insure that DSS didn’t violate the law or it’s own policy? Having been involved in numerous child custondy cases I can tell you from experience that they often do. What county is this in? Several counties in NC are currently under review by the state for failing to meet state standards.
You say you did cheat on him and that he knows. Was this a one time thing? Did the two of you reconcile after? As for his interfering with the criminal investigation have you talked to the law enforcement agency running the investigation and asked them to investigate his interferance? He may be criminally liable in this matter.
You should not have to worry about custody issues becouse a crime was commited against you. That is unreasonable and should not sway the courts opinion in this matter.
As for his disposing of marital property it should not happen. The courts will decide what happens to it. The courts will try to determine what kind of standard of living you face without your husbands help and if that will affect your childs standard of living if they place the child with you. The better your standard of living the better your chances. You may want to show a very high standard (better than your husband) to prove the child will be financially better off with you. Are you currently living with anyone? Can you can prove a long term stable relationship with the possibility of marriage? Showing that you are in a long term stable relationship can be a good thing for child custody.
You also might want to consider gathering as much negative evidence that you can against your husband to help foster your child custody claims. Getting a local private investigator may be a good option. Private investigators often help sway the courts desicions drastically in custody cases. Hope this helped. Good luck!
Dear bjkmom:
Greetings. I don’t believe that the rape itself could cause you to lose custody. Maybe you both live in different areas of town where crime rates are different, or some other factor is involved here. However, I cannot evaluate your case at a distance. So no, I don’t think that a criminal action against you alone would merit you losing custody of your child.
No, you may not have any responsibility for the mortgage directly, but you are entitled to the marital equity, if any. Thank you.
Janet L. Fritts
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.256.1665 direct fax
301 McCullough Drive Suite 510
Charlotte, North Carolina 28262
704.644.2831 main voice
704.307.4595 main fax
1829 East Franklin Street, Bldg 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
919.321.0780 main phone
919.787.6668 main fax
The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.
My husband came home from Iraq in March of this year. He had been gone for a year. During that time I had been raped while my son was sleeping in the house, and due to that, DSS was involved making unannounced visits for 6 months. They cleared me and found that my son was in no harm. When my husband got home from Iraq, he got a lawyer and filed for emergancy custody of our son who was a little over a year old at the time. I had had my son by myself for his whole life and he had never even had so much as an ear infection, much less been abused or neglected. My husband has used the rape as the reason why he needs custody of my son. He took the house, the car, and all the money we had in a joint account. He has also started disposing of all the furniture and everything in the house.
Yes, I had cheated on him, and he knows this. I have had to complete a questionnere for his lawyer asking questions about the rape, and that seems to be the only thing that enabled him to get custody of my son. He has also interfered with the investigation of the rape so that there has been no arrests made yet (this happened over a year ago, he got the interviews of the subjects leaked to him before they made it to the sherrifs department, so they had to be thrown out).
So my question is this: Do I actually face permanently losing custody of my son because I had a crime commited against me?
Also, our house is titled in both of our names, but the mortgage is in only his name. Do I have any responsibility for that?