Let me give a little background here.
We are about $9k behind in our house payments. This happened during a time that I was left in charge of the finances and was trying to deal with it all myself. He would come and demand I buy this, buy that, get him this, get him that and if I ever said we didn’t have the money for it, I would catch hell for that so to avoid major problems, I would either not pay the mortgage or would call and cancel the check. I was making every attempt to work things out via payment arrangements with the bank until the whole divorce thing came about and once he found out what was going on (he never bothered to look into what was being done with the finances), he threatened me because “we could lose the house and it would be my fault”. I thought all financial decisions made as a married couple (even though papers have been served, we are still living under the same roof and this all happened PRIOR to the papers being served. He has since had me removed from the mortgage account so I can’t even call to get any information regarding what’s happening, he won’t tell me what’s happening and he won’t give me the opportunity to try and make it right either.
In a conversation he had with my mother, he informed her that "his attorney has spoken with judges and has guaranteed that if he gets the back balance taken care of, he will be assured to keep the house and to have custody of our two daughters. As stated in previous notes, I have proof of bruises he’s left on my arms, videos and audios of arguements where he has told me to “shut the F*** up” and spoken to me horribly and I have kept a journal for the past 18 months or more regarding every awful thing he has done to me. I’m no perfect parent but I make sure the girls are taken care of, make sure they get to school, are taken care of after school, etc. I am the primary caregiver and have been since they were born.
My question is whether this is a possibility or not?? Can an attorney guarantee him custody and possession of the home if he takes care of the back balance of the mortgage? Can his attorney actually speak to judges regarding the case and get their input on it??
Thank you.
In my opinion his attorney is bluffing. An attorney cannot speak to a judge “ex parte”, or outside of the presence of the other party. His attorney cannot make a guarantee on an award of property or child custody, as the court will determine the same after a proper hearing has been had in which both you and your soon to be ex have a opportunity to be heard on the issues.
As always, thank you. Another question that arose over the weekend.
He informed my mother that “she should just get used to the fact that he’s going to have custody” (that was when he said his attorney guaranteed that he would get custody if he makes sure the house is in order). He also told her that he’s working on possibly getting a position with a company that would allow him to work from home, which would also cinch him having custody of the girls.
I find this difficult to believe but of course, I have to ask whether his ability to work from home will have a bearing on whether he obtains custody or not. I mean he’ll still be working and he works and neglects the girls quite often when they’re home as it is.
I know that so much of this could be avoided if I could just get out from under the same roof as him but he has threatened to call the police and cause further problems and I just can’t put the girls through anymore than they’ve already been through so it was my choice to wait it out and PRAY that the courts come through. However, the courts’ time table is quickly becoming detrimental to the welfare of the girls and I.
Thank you for all your help and insight.
Additionally, my mother wanted me to ask this question.
If he comes to my mother and insinuates in underlying conversation that if my mother goes up against him in court (siding with me), that he wouldn’t let my Mom or Dad see the girls any longer, does he have that right to keep the children from their grandparents if he somehow obtained custody of the girls? Do my parents have any kind of recourse if he attempts this?
I have a question. If I get married with someone paying child support will my wages be included to increase his child support payments?
Thanks
There is no one factor that will determine the custodial schedule, his ability to work from home certainly will not guarantee him an award of primary physical custody.
The children will be able to spend time with your parents as you see fit during your custodial time.
To nc resident- No, only the incomes of the parents of the child are considered in a child support calculation.