Had an affair after I did

Long story short…I had an affair she found out. Started to file for divorce but never followed though with separation papers. Now she is having an affair and is scheduling to meet him and leave our son with friends that live in his city. Since NC is a one party consent state on recording…I recorded the convo to gain this information. She knows I heard part of the convo but not all of it. She says she wants to speed up the separation or back date divorce to end things sooner. She says she has done nothing wrong and is using my previous affair from back in July to get custody of our child. Also, this guy is someone she previously knew before. It that it matters but I feel this has happened before with her.

  1. Do I have a better case giving she is setting up a meeting or will possibly meet?

  2. Does that make her case weaker and mine stronger?

  3. She is using social media apps to cover her tracks and not over text?

(1) It sounds like you have evidence to help show your wife is furthering an affair. To have an effect on alimony, you would need to show that she committed an act of illicit sexual behavior during the marriage. However, if you committed an act of illicit sexual behavior during the marriage and your wife could prove this, then each of your positions may be equal - neither would be better than the other if you both committed an act of illicit sexual behavior.

(2) As for custody, she likely does not have a strong argument to get custody of your child for the mere fact that you had an affair first. Unless you demonstrated an inability to care for your child and be a parent to your child during your affair or as a result of your affair, she will have a difficult time being awarded primary custody based on your affair alone.

(3) If you are concerned about her whereabouts, you can hire a private investigator to legally follow and surveil her.

Anna Ayscue

Attorney with Rosen Law Firm Cary • Chapel Hill • Durham • Raleigh • Wake Forest

Rosen Online | Unlimited confidential access to a North Carolina attorney for $199/mo - click here

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service only, a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action. The information posted on this forum is available for public viewing and is not intended to create an attorney client relationship with any individual. These answers are provided for informational purposes only, a person should consult with their own individual legal counsel before taking any action that could affect their legal rights or obligations.