I'm just a bird in a cage


#1

Dear Twiceloser:

Greetings. First, what does she want? Is it worth taking one more step or one more action without having a complete settlement offer from her? If she has not provided one, then make no more efforts. If you have not provided one, then make one!

If she has provided a settlement offer, make sure that you have a comprehensive response already made. Figure out where the “tennis ball” is, point it out to everyone (all attorneys and the parties), and make sure it gets back over the net.

Finally, what the heck does “not rattling the cage” have to do with coming to a settlement. No one should spend their life in limbo. Limbo benefits only the attorneys (generally). Thank you.

Janet L. Fritts
Attorney with Rosen Divorce
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.256.1665 direct fax

10925 David Taylor Drive, Suite 100
Charlotte, North Carolina 28262
704.644.2831 main voice
704.307.4595 main fax

ROSENDIVORCE.COM

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.


#2

</font id=“size3”></font id=“Times New Roman”>Dear Janet:

Thank you so much for your informative response. I apologize for the long delay, but I was broadsided by a enormous health insurance premium, and had to go back to wo… wor… work. It’s hard for me to even say the word.

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She has failed to respond to our single request for a copy of her tax return for one year. In response to your question “What does she want?”, to date there has not been the any settlement offer whatsoever from her lawyer. Not even a hint on one.
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I told my lawyer in the beginning that emotions don’t rule my financial dealings, and if he thought she made a fair offer, I would accept it. His opinion is that I don’t owe her squat. Our divorce will be final within a month, and my lawyer has said after that date “somebody had better fish, or be prepared to cut bait.” I’m past ready to launch the boat.
Thanks so much for the time and effort you put into this forum. It is appreciated very much.

Twiceloser (but still has faith in marriage)


#3

Dear Twiceloser:

I am sorry to hear about the health insurance premium. Let me just provide one warning:

When the divorce judgment goes through, if an action for alimony and/or equitable distribution has not been filed, you lose the rights to ask for either of these and property becomes owned by the party who’s name the property is titled to. Thank you.

Janet L. Fritts
Attorney with Rosen Divorce
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.256.1665 direct fax

10925 David Taylor Drive, Suite 100
Charlotte, North Carolina 28262
704.644.2831 main voice
704.307.4595 main fax

ROSENDIVORCE.COM

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.


#4

</font id=“size4”></font id=“Comic Sans MS”> I have been responding to demands (tax reports, financial statement, etc.) for 11 months now, and am right where I was when we started. We have a pre-nuptial agreement, which my lawyer says is good, and her’s must think is legal since he has continually tried to shoot it down. Her lawyer even suggested fraud on the financial statement, which caused me to dig up financial data from years ago to prove him wrong. My lawyer keeps saying “We don’t want to rattle the cage.” but I’m the dang one in the cage! If things went really wrong, I could be out possibly $100K to $200K, I work part time, so I afraid to spend any real money for anything.

 Is there any tactic to "Call for the question" to paraphrase Roberts Rules of Order? It was my wife that left ( I know, legally "so what") and my Golden Years are becoming a pile of rust.

Thanks! You guys are the greatest.