In your professional opinion - visitation & cashing stock

Separated from my wife 1/2010, she is employed fulltime and I am unemployed for 10 months. I have custody and she signed an agreement with visitation and has not once lived up to her agreement to have the kids alternating weekends. On Fridays, she brings them back to me after only 3 hours of feeding them dinner, claiming she is homeless and has no place to keep the kids. This has been going on for 3 months. She and her attorney filed for custody, child support and alimony. She is trying to cash in jointly owned stock options (I believe to pay her lawyer) and I am trying to make she directs these funds to establish a residence/apt to enable having the kids alternating weekends. I have refused to endorse check until she agrees to use funds to establish residence. She refuses to agree to the use of funds clause. Neighbors have told me she is living with friends, but she refuses to disclose location to me. What would you recommend for proceeding forward:

#1 endorse the check for $6K (w agreement to credit me split 50/50 in ED) and allow her to pay her attorney and continue living with her friends and fail to live up to the visitation agreement

#2 refuse to endorse the check and let her continue claiming homeless and rack up attorney fees? She is still contributing to her 401k and contributing to the ESPP at work, if she would adjust her take home pay, she surely could afford housing without cashing in stock. This option would still result in failure to live up to alternating weekend visitation agreement.

In your professional opinion, what is your feel about the courts view of the significance of holding back on endorsing check for stock versus failing to hold up to the agreed visitation schedule (missing overnights on alternating weekends) She is notorious for using her attorney for rediculous questions that have to be passed to my attorney - like when is our daughter’s ballet recital?

Please confirm my understanding and if you have any corrections or suggestions:

  1. She has filed for custody and wants the kids to live with her,
  2. I have been the primary care giver for the past year, stay at home dad - children are currently living with me - she barely lives up to the agreed visitation of 12 hours a week, no show 3 times already in addition to blowing off weekends.
  3. She makes more than me and I am the dependant spouse needing child support from her according to calculators
  4. Alimony is not an option as I have solid evidence of her extra marital affair

Thanks - Felix

You cannot force her to allocate funds in a certain way. You can continue to refuse to endorse the check however, and in my opinion this will not prejudice you in court.

If you do sign the check, the funds will be credited to her in ED.