As far as I know, if he left with intention to remain apart, he can’t come back w/o your permission under the Domestic Criminal Trespass statute. (NCGS 14-134.3).
You might be able to pursue a divorce from bed & board to remove him from the marital dwelling. Or possibly get a restraining order.
It would be advisable to speak with an attorney regarding your options.
I am currently going thru a divorce with a bi-polar/manic depressive man. It is being dragged out for almost 2 years. We were together for 6 and he was even involuntarily committed to a mental ward. Get out now!!I wish I had left earlier when the threats first started. I left everything. Got in my car with the kids, cat and the clothes on my back. I don’t want anything except for him to go away.
The court wouldn’t let my attorney use the mental hospital paper work due to the HIPPA act. And I am not sure that the court or attorney’s are familiar with the unpredictable nature of this disorder. One day he wants to negotiate and the next he is fighting mad. He lies on the court stand. He has no concept of time. I keep all the documentation. Do everything by email. And still the judge doesn’t care. HE is a danger to himself and others. Luckily he hasn’t done much of the visitation but continues to fight for custody of children he hasn’t seen in almost 8 months. It is only to get to me. Good luck.
Once he leaves and declares his intentions to live seperate, you can change the locks, beacuse you two are seperated. There is no “legal seperation” in NC. Living apart = seperation He doesn not have the right to re-enter without your permission. If he wants to reconcile whoopee for him, but it doesn’t mean you want to. He left, you do not have to let him come back. BE CAREFUL!!! If you play the yo yo game where you let him come back and he leaves, come back… leave, etc, you can get causght without the right to make him stay out. You should come up with a seperation agreement as soon as possible. Even without it you can be seperated, but with it in hand the police will have to make him leave. (as long as it is stated he is the one to live elsewhere) Good Luck, it looks like you will have a hard, rocky road ahead of you.
If he moved out of the residence and you told him not to return then he is committing the crime of domestic criminal trespass if he returns. However, if the police will not enforce this law, then your option would be to seek assistance of an attorney and explore the other options you may have to get him out of the residence. If he has been verbally abusive towards you, you may have grounds for a divorce from bed and board.
Helena M. Nevicosi
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.787.6361 main fax
Charlotte Office
301 McCullough Drive
Suite 510
Charlotte, NC 28262
Main Phone: (704)307.4600
Main Fax: (704) 9343.0044
Durham & Chapel Hill Office
1829 East Franklin Street
Building 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
(919) 321.0780
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I have been married to a man for 3 years and have listened to verbal threats of abandonment and name-calling on a weekly basis. He has thrown things at me but never touched me and I have had to call the police a few times to calm him down when he was tearing the house up. He was recently diagnosed with bi-polar disorder and is now using that as an excuse when he wants to, “act the fool”, as I call it. Twelve days ago he just gets out of his chair and starts loading up his possessions and tells me he can’t take it anymore and moves in with his mother. Today he came over and said he’s decided he wants to work it out between us ( I don’t) and is moving back in. The police say he can move back in unless I get a restraining order. Is this true?, I am terrefied to be around him now and don’t know what to do.
Shannon F Canter