Trying to Reach Agmt on Child Support/Visitation


#1

If the calculator comes up with $659 then that’s the number. Of course, I’m assuming you want control of the insurance to drop the number too. Be sure your work isn’t seasonal, or that your company is on a good footing, because ultimately you’ll be responsible for keeping the insurance going. Is it better or worse coverage?

Everything is relative. If your incomes are high, then $659 is par. Some of us pay $200, some much much more.

I read on this site that expenses incurred in visitation are not counted.

As for the smoke, if you can prove this, I would say that that is a valid point to bring up–but you can’t compel him to find a place of his own. You can compel him, however, to find a safe place to visit with your son. Maybe he can come and stay overnight at a hotel in your hometown until he finds a place of his own.


#2

So hes willing to pay $500 but you want $659 and he only makes $400 more than you in income and he pays the medical insurance plus you moved away after the agreement was made (taking the chil away from his or her father) forcing him to drive 150 miles to see his child. I think you need to take what he is offering and move on before he takes you to court, as far as where he reside is no of your business but if you think hes putting the child in any danger you should inform the courts and have proof not assumptions. But it seems to me that you are not being reasonable, you got a man thats willing to pay you about 90% of what you think the courts "might"grant you. The question is, is he a good father? not was he a good husband. Really I mean really ask yourself that question it will save you and him alot of time, money and frustration


#3

To FATHERDORIGHT’s posting. First, I only want what is FAIR AND REASONABLE and since the calculator came up with $659 NOT ME, then I think he should be the father/man and pay what the guidelines say he needs to pay. I work full-time in the evenings and take care of our 16 mon old during the day. He doesn’t buy him clothes, etc. The $400 only covers my daycare expenses. Secondly, no, I did not move away AFTER the agreement was signed. I moved and then filed for Temporary Child Support/Custody in my hometown. I moved because I had no family/support or help with my 10 month old son at the time. His father lives 45 mins from us as does his aunt and uncle so he is always coming down to play golf (an expense he could eliminate) with his Dad, it’s not like he can’t take the time to visit with his son, if he really wanted to. Finally, the jury is still out about whether or not he is a good father … he hasn’t proven anything to me in the 16 mons of his child’s life so far.

To fatlilbeagle’s posting: Thank you so much for your response. I have definitely taken into consideration the stability of my employment and have compared insurance plans before making this decision. I have mentioned to him several times to get a hotel room when he comes to visit and I would even pay for it but he doesn’t like that suggestion … thanks again!


#4

I just want you to understand that he can possibly get joint custody with visitation right with you being the primary car giver but all that means is the will add up all the days that will be put in the order giving him enough overnight days to go to a schedule B (I think)drasticly reducing the child support.suggestion- get a lawyer to do the overnights and find out what schedule you would need to use, because you might think you should be using one schedule when you should be using the other, you overnight figures will probably be different from an attorney.


#5

I just want you to understand that he can possibly get joint custody with visitation right with you being the primary car giver but all that means is the will add up all the days that will be put in the order giving him enough overnight days to go to a schedule B (I think)drasticly reducing the child support.suggestion- get a lawyer to do the overnights and find out what schedule you would need to use, because you might think you should be using one schedule when you should be using the other, you overnight figures will probably be different from an attorney.


#6

Thanks FATHERDORIGHT. I found this on NC Child Support’s website:

Use Worksheet B when (a) the parents share custody of all of the children for whom support is being determined, or (b) when one parent has primary physical custody of one or more of the children and the parents share custody of another child. Parents share custody of a child if the child lives with each parent for at least 123 nights during the year and each parent assumes financial responsibility for the child’s expenses during the time the child lives with that parent. A parent does not have shared custody of a child when that parent has visitation rights that allow the child to spend less than 124 nights per year with the parent and the other parent has primary physical custody of the child. Shared custody is determined without regard to whether a parent has primary, shared, or joint legal custody of a child. Do not apply the self-sufficiency reserve incorporated into the shaded area of the schedule when using Worksheet B.


#7

If you don’t mind me asking, are you going to come out better asking him for more based on they schedule or are will you take what hes offering.


#8

At this point, I do not plan to take his offer. I will seek guideline child support.

Additional question for attorney response:

My ex is also saying that is going to seek travel costs associated with visiting his son due to the rise in gas prices, etc. and the fact that he is 3 hours away – can he do that? Thanks


#9

Dear mrs_kapow:

Greetings. Let’s answer all these questions you have:

  1. No, it does not seem unreasonable if that is the guideline amount. I have cases where someone is paying in excess of $1,000 per month for one child.

  2. Yes, he may be able to get travel expenses as part of the child support calculation. The court opened up the issue of extraordinary expenses about two years ago and now if you can argue it, it may be included in the calculator as an extraordinary expense or something that you must split with him.

  3. Not necessarily, but I think that he needs to show he has the space and facilities to keep a 16 month old - crib, etc.

Thank you and good luck.

Janet L. Fritts
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm

4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.256.1665 direct fax

301 McCullough Drive Suite 510
Charlotte, North Carolina 28262
704.644.2831 main voice
704.307.4595 main fax

1829 East Franklin Street, Bldg 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
919.321.0780 main phone
919.787.6668 main fax

ROSEN.COM

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.


#10

My ex and I have been arguing about the amount of child support he should pay since we separated six months ago. We have a temporary order in place right now and are going back to court next month to establish guideline child support. I agreed to a flat $400 when we first separated until we could go back to court but he says he’ll pay $500/month and that’s it that I’m trying to rape him. His gross is approx. $400/month more than mine. I pay $400/month in daycare and he pays $180 for med/dental but I can cover my son for only $41/month. So, when I plug in all of the numbers into every calculator on the web, I come up with a $600 plus figure which he STILL argues is too much. I told him I didn’t make up the form or the rules. I’m just looking for some guidance on what is reasonable and fair.

  1. Does $659/month for one child seem unreasonable?

  2. Also, I moved 150 miles away back to my hometown and now he says he is going to ask for extraordinary expenses like gas to travel to see him each week. Can he do this?

  3. Finally, with regards to visitation, he currently is residing with his mother and her husband who are chain smokers. Our son is 16 months old and I have suggested he not stay overnight based on his age and the exposure to smoke. He says he has been looking for a place of his own but hasn’t committed to anything in 6 months now. Half of the time, he stays with this friend and that friend–never at his mom’s. Doesn’t he need his own place that is fit for keeping a 16 month old over night?

Thanks in advance.