Visitation Violations and Overprotective EX


#1

I pray no one will ever have to go through what I am fearing.

Forget about the whole situation. My original post was on March 3rd. I am needing a lawyer now for sure. Even after having what I thought was a civil conversation with EX, she totally disregarded my wishes. She says she hired an investigator to find out my name. Well, either way she did it, either with her investigator or an internet search, she has my name now.

She says we can get the child this weekend. I just see Chapter 2-unlimited opening now. The child is super sensitive to everything and she is an overprotective mother (no one’s will ever live up to her standards of taking care of the child). She is overly petty and constantly threatening legal defenses. I sometimes wonder if all of this is truly worth it. It’s not a two way street - everything is her way or no way. And the sad part about it is that the system seems to be motherly-designed.

I am sure we will see the worms crawling out of the can for sure.

Good luck to everyone else in their endeavors - especially the fathers who go against the “dead beat dad” stereotype and try to be a part of their child’s lives financially and physically.

Pray for me and us.


#2

Dear FrustratedFiancee:

Greetings. Yes, you should give her your name since you are spending time with her child (even if the child is also your fiancee’s child). Any parent would want to know the name of a person that is spending large amounts of time with their child. That does not open you up for unlimited legal action by her though.

I think you may be overreacting. What kind of action could she file against you that would stick? When the child is in your financee’s care he is responsible.

No, I cannot imagine that you would be held liable for doing the child’s hair for church.

You can stop the insanity in one of two ways that I see:

  1. Get a better attorney to help equalize the situation. Winning usually stops a parent’s bad behavior (or possibly counseling).
  2. Modify the child support amount to take into account the costs of traveling.

Thank you.

Janet L. Fritts
Attorney with Rosen Divorce
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.256.1665 direct fax

10925 David Taylor Drive, Suite 100
Charlotte, North Carolina 28262
704.644.2831 main voice
704.307.4595 main fax

ROSENDIVORCE.COM

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.


#3

Thank you, Ms. Fritts, for your response. I really think that this forum is excellent. I value your advice.

Yes, I might have been overreacting a bit in the last post, but I don’t put anything past a malicious person and devious mind. Since my last post, my fiance has been served with domestic violence/protective order papers (bogus lies and an attempt to wiggle her way out of visitation and the state). He went to court - judge dismissed all of that stupidity - he didn’t believe a word from her. Our lawyer really brought out the truth. She then tells the judge that she has moved to GA. (Parenting agreement says she has to give 90 day notice before doing so.) Then she comes back after losing the domestic violence case and says that she hasn’t moved.

Now we get a letter from her lawyer saying that she wants to move to GA. What are the odds that a judge would allow her to move to GA. Her excuse for not meeting us halfway from Whiteville, NC was because she didn’t have reliable transportation. Now she wants to move even farther out.

Questions:
Would a judge order her to meet us halfway or more than halfway since she was the one to move away?
Would a judge even allow her to move being that my fiance has only seen his daughter a total of four out of eight visitations? (she refuses or has visitation tied up around court legalities)
What would we have to prove for change of custody - us having a more fit environment or her being an unfit parent? - - -she isn’t working and can’t seem to keep a job

Thanks for any insight.


#4

Dear Frustraded Fiancee:

Greetings. Let’s see if I can tell you what you are looking for:

  1. Yes, the judge may order her to drive closer to you.
  2. Yes, the judge may allow her to move, but maybe the child should come to live with you?
  3. You would have to prove that there was a substantial change in circumstances from the last order and that living with you is in the best interests of the minor child. Good luck!

Janet L. Fritts
Attorney with Rosen Divorce
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.256.1665 direct fax

10925 David Taylor Drive, Suite 100
Charlotte, North Carolina 28262
704.644.2831 main voice
704.307.4595 main fax

ROSENDIVORCE.COM

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.


#5

Well, this is the latest. We are scheduled to go to court to determine an appropriate visitation schedule. Baby Mama is no longer living at her residence in NC. Instead she is back and forth between her mother


#6

Dear Frustrated Fiancee:

Greetings. Did you say “RAT POISION?” You need to call Child Protective Services (CPS in NC is now the replacement for DSS).

You should have no problem on Monday with this one and probably win hands down.

Janet L. Fritts
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm

4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.256.1665 direct fax

10925 David Taylor Drive, Suite 100
Charlotte, North Carolina 28262
704.644.2831 main voice
704.307.4595 main fax

1829 East Franklin Street, Bldg 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
919.321.0780 main phone
919.787.6668 main fax

ROSEN.COM

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.


#7

In advance, I apologize for typing a book, but I wanted you to have as much of the situation as possible to consider.

My fiance who lives here in Raleigh and his EX who lives in Whiteville have recently entered into a court order of visitation/joint custody. Visitation began the latter weekend of January. We had a great time on our first visit.

EX had a list of the child’s daily needs and meds (child has asthma) of which we followed very carefully. One note was not to do the child’s hair. In trying to respect her wishes, I did not do the child’s hair and was utterly embarrassed come Sunday when it was time for church. Her hair was a mess - broken rubber bands, bed head, and frizziness. The only reason she could provide for not wanting anyone to do it was that the child would have a fit - like any child her age (2).

During visitation, the child ran through bushes trying to escape the tickle monster. In the process, there were scratches on her little arms and a cut on her finger. At drop off, the EX comes to the vehicle and just takes the child to the house and leaves us to take all of her little things to the house. There was no communication. Instead she hands my fiancee a two-paged letter (demands in addition to the agreement) asking for my full name - "I need your fiancee