I would like to know is there a line between just being mean & verbal abuse. If there is a line where is that line drawn?
Here is a short summary of my situation. There was infidelity in my marriage. The infidelity was discovered & my husband and I decided to stay together and work through it as long as it did not happen again which is exactly what I wanted to do. However he cannot seem to let go of what happened which I completely understand it is a tough situation, but I feel like he is taking it a bit above and beyond. He has started to completely berate me sometimes in front of our young child. He uses every opportunity to shove this back in my face and put me down. Some examples.
The Day of my Grandmothers Funeral: I was trying to do something nice for him by taking him out to nice restaurant to celebrate his birthday early with my family and the celebrate the life of our grandmother. On the way to the restaurant he started screaming at me in the car. I told him please dont do this to me today I just lost my grandmother & he replied with “Your feelings? ■■■■ your feelings!! ■■■■ you, ■■■■ you, ■■■■ you!! Your a disgusting whore & you dont know how to stay off your damn back”. These have become common names that I am called. He has told me more than once that:
- I am a slut
- I am a whore
- I am a disgusting whore
- I disgust him
- That I don’t know how to stay off my back
- He has asked me “how hard is it to stay off your back”
- He has told me that I “ruined his entire adult life”
When I bring it to his attention that these things are very hurtful I am told “Thats what you deserve you brought it all on yourself”, “Sometimes the truth hurts”, “■■■■ your feelings”, “Theres the door…go” & stuff like that. I have become very withdrawn, depressed and suicidial at times. I hate me. I have no self-esteem and my confidence is completely gone.
Is any of this verbal abuse or is this indeed “what I deserve”