Hello. My husband went from Joint Custody to Worksheet A this year 2011 Their original separation agreement states they must offer right of first refusal to each other before engaging a sitter. Can my husband’s X opt to take the child (rather than let us use our sitter) then claim she is owed more money for more overnights beyond the worksheet A amount because she did so. We have also had situations where she asks to take the child over holidays for additional time. My husband wants his child to have time with her extended family but cannot afford to have her come back and say she is owed more money because she kept the child more overnights. We have scoured the internet but cannot find anything related to this; only that Worksheet A is base on the amount of overnights.
If the custodial schedule is set her having a few nights here and there should not change support. In order to have child support modified she would have to prove that the consistently has the children more than 123 nights per year, not just a few extra overnights.
We would really prefer to use our sitter but if we do not notify her of intent we have gone against what the agreement states.
So we feel we run a risk of further financial hardship from this. Our requests to use a sitter are very rare; this is the first this year.
However she consistently wants about three weekend additional a year (when they occur over our weekends) Easter, a week in the summer, and Thanksgiving and Christmas. (However the agreement state she gets the child holidays so do those days count against us?)
Maybe 6-8 days all at her request over a year and about 3 from us (avg) notifying her of intent to use sitter
Can we deny her requests for extra time that fall on our scheduled weekend(s)?
Also - what can we do to have this separation agreement thrown out? The firm that wrote it in 2002 is defunct and even a lawyer stated the document was “terribly written and extremely vague”.
Her attorney used the wording to bypass mediation and go straight to court over her desires for more money. (She lied and told my gullible x if he gave her more days she would not seek more support - and then did so) The court decided on Worksheet A with no deviation but she had to pay her own court /atty costs
We borrowed thousands to defend ourselves only to feel little is resolved other than the support amount.
We live in Charlotte; were not terribly happy with our firm and would appreciate any advice or direction as we simply have no funds to defend against her.
If she is voluntarily taking the child on holidays that will not change support, unless this becomes a consistent issue and which allows her more than 123 overnights a year, at that point she could chose to modify support.
You do not have to give her extra time outside of the agreement.
If you want to change custody you will need to file suit for the same, unless the ex agrees to execute a new agreement, there is no way to have the existing agreement thrown out.
Thank you so much
You are welcome, I wish you the best.