50/50 Asset distribution

It is my understanding in NC all marital assests are divided 50/50. If there is no adultery, domestic abuse, or financial hardship just the spouse wants to move on, Am I still as an 80/20 wage earner obligated to give her 50% of everything I worked so hard for for our future and retirement? No children or child support involved. She refused to even consider counseling. 24 years down the drain.

Equitable distribution in NC is usually equal distribution unless there is a factor for the court to consider when one party should get more or less. A list of factors is contained in the equitable distribution statute (NCGS 50-20©).

I survived “mediation” just four weeks ago. Unfortunately, everyone from the judge to both attorneys made a whole lot of money, since we spent 5 hours going back and forward. On top of the 50/50 equitable dristribution his attorney had subpoena me to disclose at the mediation table a copy of my latest 401-k statements (which I started 5 1/2 yrs before I met this individual). Plus, my children’s child support (which began 10 years ago before I met this individual). Please, would you shine some light over my shoulder and answer this for me. Is this possible? how fair is this to my children? what else could this individual attempt to get from me? Is there anything I should be worrying about?
I should clarify that this marriage only lasted 3 1/2 yrs. Therfore, my daughter and I left the home because he was mentally abusing me and began physically and mentally abusing my daughter. We had to get out , for our sake, we didn’t have too many options.

Even if the accounts were not marital, separate assets can be a factor considered by the judge when determining whether an equal distribution is an equitable distribution. You should refer to the statute to look at the whole list of factors.