My STBX is telling my children that at the age of 14 they will be able to decide which parent they can live with. Is this true? Can my 14 yr old decide to just up and change who they reside with?
Also if we have an agreement we made up at time of separation(signed by both and notarized) and it states that the kids will reside at my address does that qualify as physical custody? If so, is that legally binding?
Your agreement is legally binding, however either parent can always file a motion to modify custody, based on the best interests of the children. Courts always have the ability re-visit custody agreements and ensure that the custody schedule reflects the best interests of the children. So your STBX can file a motion to modify your existing custody agreement.
with regard to the age of the children, and whether they can chose who to live with, we have an FAQ that addresses this question exactly. Check out the link below:
Do children get to decide who to live with?