My husband and I have been divorced since December 5, 2006. During the month of January of 2007 he moved into his girlfriend’s trailer. While talking with someone today I mentioned this. The person asked if he could still have visits with the kids if he was living with his girlfriend and not married. She said she knew of another woman who was divorced and told by her atty that her boyfriend could not be there if she wanted the kids to visit.
Is this true?
Also I kind of feel that I got the shaft when the divorce took place. My atty showed up at my house on Dec. 5th, 2006 and shook my hand while saying Congratulations, you’re divorced. I said I didn’t know I had court today. You didn’t tell me we had court. I was going to contest the divorce. My atty said you didn’t need to be there, trust me you didn’t want to be there and that I couldn’t contest it because we had been separated for a year. This was contrary to what I had been told by a member of the legal staff at his office just a week or so before.
Furthermore, I was told by my ex-husband that when the judge asked where I was, my atty told the judge that it was in the best interest of his client that I not be there.
While my atty had my husband at the courthouse, he went ahead and discussed the child custody, visitation, child support and alimony with the judge. The judge wanted something drawn up that very day concerning all those things and wanted my husband paying child support by Jan. 1, 2007.
I spoke to my atty that afternoon [Dec 5th] and asked why I wasn’t told about the court date. He never really came out and told me why, he just beat around the bush about it. I didn’t sign anything that afternoon.
I was summoned to his office later that month on Dec 27th. My atty wanted me to sign all the papers. I didn’t agree with everything and didn’t sign that day. I especially didn’t agree with the part about either party can designate whomever they desire to come and pick up the children. I also was required to resume the house payment. My atty had to leave to go to court so I couldn’t ask him anything.
I saw my atty a couple of days after the beginning of the New Year and told him my concerns and also asked about the child support of $1000.00/month for 3 children and why the amount of alimony was set at $500.00 per month for only 2 years. I had heard that I was entitled to half the number of years that we had been married from a friend who is going through the same thing.
My atty said the amount of time was based on my workability but never explained how they arrived at any of the figures etc to me. I haven’t worked since 1994 and have been a stay at home mom, homeschooling our 2 older children. They currently attend public school because my husband wanted them to and then he left us the month after they started school in 2005.
He also told me that the judge had already approved all of this and if I didn’t sign it and it went back in front of the judge, he would probably cut me a raw deal. I decided to sign the papers at that time figuring this was the best I could do and I didn’t want to go back to court and end up with less than what was on the papers for me to sign. Although I didn’t agree, I thought if the judge has already approved this then I might as well sign it because I wasn’t going to do any better. Now I am wondering if I should have pursued the issue and had things changed. I kind of feel that I could have done better. We were married for 13 years when my husband left and 14 by the time the divorce took place.
We are now due to return to court on March 19, 2007 to disperse the property. I was told I would have to sell the house. I really don’t want to. What can I do about this?
My husband also didn’t pay me for the month of January, 2007. We had court on Jan 16, 2007 and I was told that my husband had to pay me after that. I spoke to the atty about that and to my husband 2 times so far about it. No response from either.
I have since contacted my atty, seen him or left messages at his office 4 times about getting a copy of what I signed. I still don’t have anything. I want to know if the papers stated that I was to do taxes with my ex-husband. My atty told me that the judge was going to order that we do taxes together but I don’t recall if it was on what I signed. If not, I don’t want to. I don’t trust my husband to be honest on the taxes and don’t wish to sign my name to it.
My atty has told me things and then the next time I speak with him has changed the answer to the same questions. Like originally he told me that anything we bought was still considered marital property even after my husband had left. So I kept track of all these things etc that I knew of him buying and what I purchased. I asked him several times about papers/forms to fill out for dispersal of property. In the end, he told me he needed a list of the assets, who had it, what it might sell for at a garage sale, and who was to get it. I asked him to clarify if the property was based on the point of separation. His office staff had already told me it was only up to the date of separation but said to take his word for it. After that is when he told me it was only until the date of separation. There have been so many incidents like this, him saying one thing and then I notice he says another the next time.
Because of my finances and the fact that I didn’t have a job, I have not followed through with finding another atty, but now wonder if I should and is it too late to change anything that I didn’t get fair judgment on??
Thanks for your reply.