Next Steps Post Separation Please Help

Ex emotionally abused/abandoned me - pushing me out of our apt MAR 2021 – reconciled briefly JUN 2021 – and regressed SEPT 2021 where I had to leave altogether.

Within a year’s time, separation agreement was drawn up with collective consent and notice with personal witnesses signing off as witnesses – and within 6 months time, he creates a new version through a third party program, citing that it was basically the same document (though the language was far more convoluted and difficult to understand on my end). No property or assets or children. No fault divorce.

The process became too difficult to handle as he was in control of finances and I was fearful of retaliation – I never responded to the new separation agreement which had an official notary signature (no cut off date listed).

It has now been 3 years of no contact as I began to experience memory loss and severe mental difficulties. Now in a better place – what is my quickest, cheapest, and safest way to push forward the divorce? I truly do not want to contact this person if at all possible. They currently live in VA.

If you are a resident of NC and have been for at least 6 months, then you can file for absolute divorce in the county in which you reside.

You will need his address in Virginia so you can serve him with the divorce complaint. The complaint is properly served by certified mail that the defendant signs for or is served personally by sheriff’s deputy.

The entire absolute divorce process takes 2-3 months depending on how long it takes it serve the defendant and how long it takes to get a court date.

You may find our Do It Yourself Divorce Guide helpful. This has a step-by-step process on how to get an absolute divorce, how to fill out the forms, what to do with the forms, etc.


Anna Ayscue

Attorney with Rosen Law Firm Cary • Chapel Hill • Durham • Raleigh • Wake Forest

Rosen Online | Unlimited confidential access to a North Carolina attorney for $199/mo - click here

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