I am divorced with one child (currently 13) with shared custody. As we separated, my Ex filed for PSS and temporary child support, which the judge set. As we moved toward divorce, she calendared alimony. We finally negotiated an alimony settlement, but she never calendared or even asked about permanent child support. I however continued to pay the temp amount.
Fast forward four years, I am still paying alimony and the CS (at the temporary amount) the total of which account for nearly 36% of my take home. I find that I have eaten through all of my savings and I am struggling monthly to pay my bills each month. I am, for the first time ever, carrying credit card debt. At the same time, my ex took a two-week trip to Europe, a Caribbean cruise, two trips to Florida, and a week at the beach this year. She even has a cleaning lady.
I saw an attorney last week to discuss modification of CS and Alimony. Her feeling was that:
a) Yes it seems unfair, but not having the money to pay your bills does not constitute a change in circumstance enough for a judge to modify alimony. True?? I would hope fairness of the situation would be taken into account.
b) Since permanent CS was never set and no one complained, the court would likely just assume the temp order became a permanent order. Does it work that way? It just magically becomes a perm order without any review or paper work.
c) If we were to calendar perm CS ourselves, any savings that I would see would likely be eaten up in legal fees.
