Wife moving to NC (custody/residency)

North Carolina Divorce Law Divorce and Separation Answers
#1

Once the children have lived here for six month North Carolina has jurisdiction over them. However, unless there is a court order or custody agreement your Wife could take the children and move back to the state you used to live in and your recourse would be to file a lawsuit and try to bring them back. If the children are comfortable and familiar in their former state and they have friends, family, and a support network there, there is a good chance the court would let them move back. The court does have a preference to leave children close to both biological parents, but they will consider all factors when making a decision.

I cannot tell you if this is a good idea emotionally, only you can decide that. If the court believes you moved her down here only to allow NC to assume jurisdiction, that may not reflect favorably on you.

Helena M. Nevicosi
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm

4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.787.6361 main fax

301 McCullough Drive
Suite 510
Charlotte, NC 28262
Main Voice: 704.307.4600
Main Fax: 704.943.0044

1829 East Franklin Street, Bldg 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
919.321.0780 main phone
919.787.6668 main fax

ROSEN.COM

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.

#2

I understand and thanks for the reply. I had no intention of divorcing until after I had been down here for a while…my mother-in-law was quoted as telling my wife “good…let him go to nc and then you can divorce him and I’ll take care of you.” What did I do wrong? I worked two jobs so my wife could be a stay at home mom. Money was tight and any time her family asked why she didn’t go out and get a job she told them it was because I wouldn’t let her even though the decision was made because she wanted to be home with my son, which I felt was very important. She would cry and tell me that it would break her heart to have to leave him in daycare. There’s alot of stuff like that which has led up to this. Personally, I would have stayed in the other state where I could be divorced in a couple of weeks and had more moral support and friends who knew good lawyers and the legal system pretty well. All I wanted was a nice place to raise my son where there weren’t drug dealers and people yelling at each other in the street outside our house…a good school where my son could get a good education and be safe and perhaps be exposed to folks who still wave to their neighbors and say “good morning” to strangers just because it’s the right thing to do. Sorry for the rambling…it just really depresses me.

#3

I wish you the best of luck, you have a tough decision to make.

Helena M. Nevicosi
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm

4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.787.6361 main fax

301 McCullough Drive
Suite 510
Charlotte, NC 28262
Main Voice: 704.307.4600
Main Fax: 704.943.0044

1829 East Franklin Street, Bldg 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
919.321.0780 main phone
919.787.6668 main fax

ROSEN.COM

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.

#4

I know that this is going to sound bad to some but here goes. I have been married for 7 years to my wife. We have a son who is 6. I moved to NC almost a year ago because I like the south, the people here, the weather and there are more jobs than where we were living. She fought me and admits to treating me badly, but only after I brought up the possibility of divorce. Both of us have mentioned it at different times. I brought this up because she was getting ready to sell our house in the other state, about 9 hours away. I needed to sign off on the paperword and gave her the option of me not signing to void the contract and allow her to stay in the state where she is presently with my son. She says that she wants to work on the marriage. I avoided the question when she asked if I really wanted a divorce. She wasn’t planning on moving until I bought a nice house down here in a nice neighborhood with an excellent school system. I know that residency requirements say 6 months, so I’m a resident. I also found out that it would be difficult for her to leave the state with my son if we got seperated/divorced. Would this only apply if she is in the state for 6 months and becomes a resident? She has a job that she will be starting soon and my son is registered at school. I love my son with everything that I have and he really is lost without me. He gives his mother a hard time (kicking, hitting, disobedience etc) and I feel that I am a stabilizing force in his life. Plus I’m his Dad and he just loves me! I don’t want to play games but if it means the difference between my son living 9 hours away and not having the opportunity to see him often and have somewhat of a relationship with him. The marriage has been awful for a long time and doesn’t show promise of improving, and honestly I don’t want it to anymore. I just don’t love her and just want out. I don’t know if I can continue to live this lie and drag this out for 6 months. I’m really not like that…but my son…