Advice very needed please


Good afternoon/evening,
I have a question as for obtaining a divorce in NC state. The situation is the following: About a year ago I legally got married to the American citizen. I am from Another country myself. Not long after the marriage I went back to my country due to the reason that my husband were about to deploy for a year(he’s in a military) so we decided that it will be better for us to go this way so I don’t have to stay in the US all by myself. During this year he was planning to have all the necessary paperwork done so he could safely bring be back to him after deployment. But he didn’t deploy that time instead he is deploying now and I am still in my home country. We haven’t seen each other for a year already. Our relationships have some troubles right now. Plus He doesn’t do anything in order to bring me back as well as nothing in order to divorce. So now I don’t know what he wants and I started thinking that I am not sure if i still can be with him judging on the way how he treats me (won’t go for details). So I would like to ask what can I do in this situation? Can I apply for divorce or only he can do this? What are my actions in this case? Can an adultery be a ground for a divorce? If not, what can? Should I get an attorney/lawyer on my side too? And if I might face some difficulties. The thing is that I don’t trust him too much for a number of reasons and afraid that he can do something behind by back for his own purposes. I was in the US for an internship program on a contract, payed all the taxes that I needed to pay but later while I applied for tax return I found out that he already filed my tax returns on his name without letting me know so after this time I got a bit suspicious about what he is doing over there and why he never notifies me about his actions. And now I can’t even keep an eye on the track of the events and don’t know what he is up to. I know that it might be better to go through marriage counseling first and try to fix everything back to normal with him but I guess its impossible on the distance. He still says ones in a while that he wants and plans to be with me but I don’t know what’s really on his mind so I’ve started thinking of a possible divorce, because now I’m simply worried to come back to him since I don’t know what to expect. What can I do?
Will be very grateful for your reply.
Yours faithfully.


NC is a no-fault divorce state, so adultery will not be a factor in a divorce. It can factor into alimony, however you are unlikely to receive alimony since it appears that you did not live together as husband and wife for very long. You will need to file for divorce based on the one year and one day separation period. You are legally separated in this state if one of you has lived separate and apart from the other for a year, with the intention of remaining separate. It depends on when intent to separate was formed. You will need to figure out what date you knew you would not be interested in reconciling and that will be your date of separation. Only one party is required to have this intent to separate and not reconcile. You can file a complaint for divorce after one year has passed from that date. Good luck to you!


Thank you for reply. May I specify one more thing? I have read in few posts on this forum that one of the parties has to reside in NC over the last 6 month in order to be able to file? My husband deploys soon for 9 months. So none of us will be living in the state. Will this mean that by the time he comes back we will need to wait 6 more month of him living in NC so to meet this residence requirement?
Thank you for your time.


So long as he is still a resident of NC you may file here. A deployment does not change a service member’s domicile.