My wife and I live in NC. She has a NC license, I do not however I have filed taxes in NC for the past two years. Ok, so I have recently discovered that my wife has been having an affair since Jan. with a well to do man in Maryland. They talk all day everyday on fb. After pressing her, she has admitted it in March. Because I looked through her phone and found the messages she feels like she cant trust me anymore. She plans on moving back to MD in July. She is the financial bread winner in our home. We have a 2 year old son that she is taking with her. I asked if she wants to work on our marriage, she said yes. She told me she would cut all communication with him while we work on our marriage. After looking at her messages (again) I realized she started talking to him the moment we left our counseling session with the pastor! I am extremely hurt and feel betrayed. After seeing those messages I now realize that she will not stop and no longer really wants to be married to me. She is going up to see her family and him on the weekend of April 5th. Does the Alienation of Affection or Criminal Conversation law apply in this case. I dont think they have had any physical interaction in NC, but are the phone calls, text messages or fb count for anything? We currently still live in the same house, since I dont make a enough to just leave. I feel helpless and stuck. Now that I realize a divorce is iminent, I want to start getting my ducks lined up without damaging my case. Any advice on these questions?
I’m not sure if I’ve said or done something against the rules, if so I do apologize. But I truly could use some advice. I’ve looked through the other aoa, however I’m not sure if the long arm statute applies, does it? He’s never step foot in the state but they do all there correspondence via fb chat and cellphone. I would move out now but i cant afford to both homes yet. It really hurts to be in a house with a person who is sleeping w/someone else and smiles and lies to your face.
I believe since your wife lives in NC then you can sue for AoA as it has been tied to this state. AoA isn’t a walk in the park though… it’s really expensive to pursue, your entire life will be exposed, judgements are inconsistant at best, and collecting on a judgement is an entirely different issue. I’m not sure how you would be able to afford to pursue an AoA case if you can’t afford to move out… most attorneys will not take AoA cases for a percentage of the judgement because of the reasons listed above.
I would concentrate on the divorce itself which would include documenting all bank accounts/assets, as well as documenting evidence of the affair for the purposes of alimony and to use as leverage during equitable distrbution.
I thank you for responding. Right now I have so many thoughts going through my head, I get everything jumbled together. Your right maybe I should focus on the divorce itself. Especially since it will be a draining process in itself. It just really grinds my gears that I he has been able to show off his offices, homes and cars and I cant hit him where it really gurts which is in his wallet! But once again, I thank you!
I empathize with your situation. I know it’s tough to do, but you really need to keep your head up, think positive and move forward. I personally don’t believe in karma or any of that. I think that things just happen and you have to try and do best with what is handed to you. If you keep thinking about how “unfair” it all is, then you really will just bring yourself down (mentally and emotionally). Also – the reality is, the only people who really benefit from the whole thing are the attorneys.
In any case, keep things well documented. Your best bet is to use the information to get a larger share of equity in your marital assets. Because you sound like the dependent spouse, you should be able to receive alimony. You need to work all that out or at least have initiated the process of equitable distribution and spousal support before the divorce is finalized.
A recent court case found that the courts of NC could have jurisdiction over a party if the party’s actions were aimed at someone in the state, such as phone calls and emails. If an alienation of affections claim is something that you are interested in pursuing, you should have a consultation to discuss all aspects of the claim.