Alimony and ED


My ex spouse has filed complaint for Alimony, ED and Child Custody. His attorney is determined not to have custody hearing until after Alimony and ED have been settled. Can you tell me what could be the purpose for this?? Thanks so much!!


We separated in Feb 2011 and are officially divorced. We went through the Equitable Distribution in a mediation that took 10 hrs in March 2103. We agreed on the handwritten document and I waited to hear back from my attorney for the official typed consent order that would need to be signed by both of us and notorized but it didn’t arrive into my e-mail box until June 2013.

When the document did finally arrive my x wife’s attorney had added a paragraph that was not discussed at the ED mediation in March 2013. We revised and agreed on the new paragraph that was added but now I would like to add a paragraph as well regarding a topic that had never been discussed. Since I am in essence giving my spouse 50% of all my assets I would like to suggest that we open a joint account that we both contribute too solely for all extraneous expenses for our two children. Not to be used for Children’s food clothing or entertainment.

Almost all the expenses are currently paid by me (my X does not work) and since the children are 14 and 16 there will be many expenses going forward until the children are out of college-which will be about 6 years. My X wife lives with her boyfriend in a very affluent area of Chapel Hill. We have joint custody although the children typically spend more time with me. I currently pay child support to my x wife but do not think it’s fair that I pay for almost every bill for the children. My older son is type 1 diabetic and requires frequent Doctor visits, insulin, test strips and other monthly medical supplies.

My X wife is double dipping. She is about to receive the last distribution of 1/2 my assets, she is receiving child support from me , free rent and board from her wealthy boyfriend and has no intention to share in the children’s extraneous expenses. After I give her the final installment of the settlement money, doesn’t it make sense to have a joint account for future expenes for the next 6 years such as tuition, medical, eye, dental etc that we would both add money to as needed. Why is this burden solely on me? Thank you.


There may be may reasons that the other attorney doesn’t want a custody
trial until equitable distribution and alimony have been heard. Without knowing the facts of your case, it’s impossible for me to speculate as to why they are requesting it in your case.

Outside of the child support obligation, your order or agreement should also detail how the extra expenses like medical, school and extracurricular activities should be spent. Maintaining a joint account for this purpose would work, but submitting receipts to the other spouse for reimbursement also works.