Beyond complicated custody


#1

So beyond lost in a child custody case. There is a lot going on and I have found myself in a place I never imagined. My husband and I separated in Dec 2017 after months of essentially living as roommates in our own home. There were talks between my husband and I for months about where the kids would go and where I would go (my oldest 3 kids are from my first marriage and I am their only parent as their father signed his rights away. The youngest 2 belong to my current husband and I.) I made the decision that I would enter into a friendly custody agreement and make a power of attorney so that my mom could keep the older three at her house (has been their home the majority of their lives) and they could stay in a school that they have beyond thrived in (2 went from IEPs and a kindergarten reading level in third grade to now in fifth grade testing completely out of those IEPs and reading Percy Jackson on their own for fun. The other is aig, battle of the books and in jr beta club) and as much as it hurts it is honestly probably the best thing I could ever do for them. My youngest two belong to my current husband and he and I had agreed that I would take those two kids with me to MD. The husband’s parents had their first overnight visit with the girls without a parent the day before I left for MD with my husband loading my van up, putting gas in the van, etc. Less than two weeks into living in Maryland my husband’s parents filed an emergency order for child custody after i refused to go back to NC by train with two small children because their son deserved to have the girls on Christmas. So they get the order and at the hearing a consent order was signed off on. I was ordered to get medicaid in MD for the kids and Jordan and I would share legal custody. So in October I found out that i would have a hearing for permanent custody Feb 19. Husband/co defendant lives with the plaintiffs. Since then I got interragatories and requests for documents that I don’t know how to answer (husband wasn’t served anything but his parents had him answer questions and told him they needed documents) there was a draft for custody/grandparent visitation i refuse to sign that mentions a crossclaim from my husband for custody but I have yet to see it. The grandparents also filed a motion for grandparent visitation on the first. I have no idea how to do anything at the moment. I would like a contenuance as suddenly there are new motions that I have not even seen yet. Im overwhelmed with everything and any advice would be welcome


#2

It sounds like there are complicated issues in your case arising from an ex parte emergency custody motion and order to motions for grandparent visitation.

You can ask for a continuance but it will be up to the judge to determine whether or not to grant it.

At a hearing/trial, you will want to make sure that you can show that the custody arrangement you would like to see is best for the two minor children and why that is best for them. Things that judges will consider is who was the primary caretaker of the children during the marriage, where their schools/daycares are, how established at the children in Dad’s city of residence vs. your city of residence, among many other factors.


Anna Ayscue

Attorney with Rosen Law Firm Cary • Chapel Hill • Durham • Raleigh • Wake Forest

Rosen Online | Unlimited confidential access to a North Carolina attorney for $199/mo - click here

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service only, a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action. The information posted on this forum is available for public viewing and is not intended to create an attorney client relationship with any individual. These answers are provided for informational purposes only, a person should consult with their own individual legal counsel before taking any action that could affect their legal rights or obligations.


#3

Out of curiosity what is considered relevant in a request for documents and intangible things. All communications between my and my codefendant from roughly 11 months before the oldest minor child was born odd but ok. (Once again codefendant lives with them and i have no way to know what he has given them because they just ask him for things). But every communication i have had on Facebook messenger, email, written etc from anyone not a lawyer from dec 1 2017? All my medical records? Lists of my family out to cousins and where they live? Im here going this is a third party who from june/july 2016 had not had the minor children they are trying to claim this substantial relationship with in their household other than a few visits with their son and I present and the one night without parental supervision before I left for MD.


#4

Those are all relatively standard requests in discovery. And for child custody cases, there is generally a broad interpretation of what is relevant since minor children are involved.

However, you can object to any requests that are too burdensome or impossible to produce, as well as any requests that are not reasonably calculated to lead to discoverable material.


Anna Ayscue

Attorney with Rosen Law Firm Cary • Chapel Hill • Durham • Raleigh • Wake Forest

Rosen Online | Unlimited confidential access to a North Carolina attorney for $199/mo - click here

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service only, a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action. The information posted on this forum is available for public viewing and is not intended to create an attorney client relationship with any individual. These answers are provided for informational purposes only, a person should consult with their own individual legal counsel before taking any action that could affect their legal rights or obligations.


#5

I understand that a lot of the questions would be fairly common to ask. However I was given this as a definition to use to answer things that were requested. " “Identify” or “identification,” when used with reference to a person, shall mean to state his or her full name; any known nickname and aliases; age; social security number; present or last known home address and telephone number; present or last known position and business affiliation or employment and the address and telephone number there; his or her employment and position at the time in question; and the relationship, past or present, that he/she has with you." I am in no way comfortable giving anyone that much information and I cannot find anywhere that seems to expect that level of information. The other main issue is that as my semi codefendant the children’s father, lives with the plaintiffs and it would have been far easier, cheaper, and far less burdensome for him to have been asked to provide documents. The plaintiffs had also tried to use me not having to go through discovery to get me to enter into a new consent order. In the original consent order the plaintiffs, my husband and myself had agreed that the children would be put on Medicaid in MD and that their son would get 7 consecutive days a month visitation. So the plaintiffs have now decided that the old consent order will not work for them trying first to say that the current agreement would not work when the kids start school and then turning around and saying their son deserves equal time with the kids and i am still responsible to get all the kids medical appointments and such up here because I made the sole decision to make MD the girls primary residence. I feel like everyone made that decision seeing as we all consented to me having them more as well as to get them put on Medicaid they have to be a resident of that state. The plaintiffs now say they only signed that into the consent order because they thought their son and I were going to work on our marriage.


#6

That is a standard definition of “identify” or “identification” in discovery, particularly interrogatories. Answer with as much information as you have for each person identified. Yes it’s true that the plaintiffs may have this information, but the other side is looking to see if there are additional people beyond who they know.

You will be able to testify in a trial about your side of the events that led to you moving to Maryland.


Anna Ayscue

Attorney with Rosen Law Firm Cary • Chapel Hill • Durham • Raleigh • Wake Forest

Rosen Online | Unlimited confidential access to a North Carolina attorney for $199/mo - click here

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service only, a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action. The information posted on this forum is available for public viewing and is not intended to create an attorney client relationship with any individual. These answers are provided for informational purposes only, a person should consult with their own individual legal counsel before taking any action that could affect their legal rights or obligations.