First, if you are still living under the same roof, you are not separated. NC absolute divorce is granted only after one year one day required separation. Your spouse could not have filed for divorce. Your spouse may be attempting to file for Divorce from Bed & Board to force you to leave the home, but can not file for divorce until the time requirement is met.
You are entitled to 1/2 the marital assets and responsible for 1/2 the marital debt regardless of who is living in the home. If you have moved out then your spouse will have to divide the equity in the home. You should first consult an attorney, get a separation agreement written up stating the intent to separate for purpose of divorce and spelling out who is leaving the home on what date. Listing the items that are being removed from the home and any other finacial information that may be divided. Document everything that you can.