Greetings. First, ask your attorney about your rights under the Domestic Criminal Trespass law. You may be amazed at what he or she tells you.
Now, to the rest of your questions:
Why could not the numerous instances of her overnight unaccountablity be considered separation? It is my opinion that they would be enough for domestic criminal trespass (especially the 18 night one). They are not enough for separation because you must live continually separate and apart. Change the locks the next time she is gone for over two nights or more and file an action for domestic criminal trespass against her.
How can I determine this to be fact? Why do you care?
How can she ignore them? She cannot. Ask your attorney to become more agressive, by sending letters every other day and filing a Motion to Compel and a Request for Attorney Fees and other Sanctions.
What motivation would her attorney have to request something like that? It is two fold … (a) if there is fault on your side, then she may think the jury will care more about her. Tape record all conversations you have with her in the future about her absences. (b) jury trials can be scary for an inexperienced attorney and expensive to prosecute.
Keep up what you are doing. When in court, hire an aggressive attorney who fights for you. Best of luck.
Janet L. Fritts
Attorney at Law
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.