Chances I (a man) can get 50/50 physical custody


#1

I’m not sure what is material and what is not:

3 Kids fairly attached to both parents

Mother:
-$41k job
-wants to end marriage
-she has not moved out yet but is planning to soon, moved out of bedroom 6 years ago but provided “sex” about weekly.
-is not willing to see a marriage councilor
-she is temperamental but a OK mother overall
-wants primary physical custody (I think is motivated by money)
-has been diagnosed with depression, she is taking several anti-depressants, takes ambien to sleep— sees multiple doctors and has her doctor brother write prescriptions for her… has some physiological/medical issues and does not handle stress well.

Father
-$49k job
-wants to work on marriage
-I take kids to school and pick them up around 60% of time
-I go to ~60% of doctors visits, etc
-I’m slighly more likely to take them out for dinner on weeknights, she spends slightly more time with them on weekends
-kids grew up in “my” “premarital house” and best friends are in neighborhood, my house in her school district

Her attorney apparently has her convinced she will get primary custody… I think 50/50 split is better for them. She initially agreed (for about 2 weeks) on a equal split but after she hired an attorney her opinion changed. I have not hired one yet, but have been making sure to keep kids a lot and spend 50% or more time with them. She has left two nights so far without kids, and took them once to her parents house overnight without asking me.


#2

Make sure you document all the things you do with them as much as possible.

If she moves out and doesn’t let you see the kids you need to file for an emergency custody hearing.

Fathers can very much so get 50/50. Do not settle for less time than you want, ever, even prior to a custody hearing. You need to set precedence and it is very difficult to convince the court of more later on. Do not agree to anything less than joint physical and legal custody.


#3

Based on the facts you presented, 50/50 seems reasonable.