Change in custody?


#1

Currently, my ex husband and I do not have a legally binding custody agreement. When we separated, we drew up an agreement ourselves and had it notarized, but we’ve never been to court for anything at all. According to the agreement we signed, we are supposed to give each other at least 48 hours notice before we change our visitation; but he travels extensively and I often have no idea at all whether he’ll be in town or not. My two children live week to week never knowing which house they’ll be at. In addition, my daughter was sexually abused by her father’s live in girlfriend’s son, and the CMPD as well as DSS are involved. She is refusing to sleep at her father’s house (the boy does not live there now, but he could come back and visit at any time), and her therapist as well as the social worker both agree that she does not have to have overnights over there until she’s ready.

My question is, given the circumstances, and other things regarding my ex husband and his girlfriend’s lifestyle/relationship, would going to court and actually pursuing full custody be advisable? I do not want this boy around either of my children, and the girlfriend is supporting her son, and I worry about any sort of retaliation against my kids from her.


#2

Yes, I think you have a very good chance of getting a change in custody based off of these facts. It is good that you have this documented with DSS and the police as well. I would certainly not allow my daughter to go over there at all, period, since the girlfriend is a live-in. I don’t blame you either for not wanting your son there, since you have a reasonable fear of retaliation. If your ex wants visitation right now, he should come over to your house or be with the kids only in a public place, without the girlfriend present.