Child custody included in seperation agreement?

no takers, is there not anyone that could help me???

To my understanding custody needs to be a legalized meaning you can agree on the terms but it needs to be done leagally not just by word of mouth or a handshake. How is your arragement good for the stable environment you children would have if bounced from house to house on a weekly basis and whole will have tie breaking authority if you should disagree and will their be child support issue.

My husband and his ex had everything in their separation agreement. It included ED, child support, and custody. They have joint legal and physical custody of their two boys with equal time. We have them one week and their mother has them the next week. You can specify these details as you have in this post. This is actually the best scenario for the children other than the parents not getting divorced. This way they get to spend an equal amount of time with each parent and each parent is equally responsible for the child. I would suggest that in the area of support, if you both make a reasonable amount of money, you agree to pay for 1/2 of what medical or dental insurance doesn’t cover. Split any expenses that are not weekly, ex. school pictures…and everything else is handled by the parent that has them that week. If they need clothes at your house, you buy them, if they need lunch money while they are with you, you give it to them. Your STBX does the same. If you make substantial amount more than you STBX then I would offer a fair amount of child support to cover what she cannot. VERY simply broken down, if it takes $100 a month to raise one child and you provide 60%, your STBX would provide the other 40%. Child support shouldn’t be that what you pay to the ex covers everything. My husband’s ex made the assumption that what he was paying her should cover everything and that she would never have to spend any of her money for the children. This assumption has gotten her into some finacial difficulties in the past.
The attorney you consulted may be wanting to draw up a separate agreement for child custody and support but in my own opinion, a separation agreement can include everything since it’s not a court order. Now were this to go to court, child support, child custody, alimony, ED are all separate issues to the courts. If you want to put it all in, and your STBX agrees to what it says then have it notorized and it’s legal. It’s an agreement. If there are some changes either of you want to make, then make them before you sign.

thank you for the responses, i do appreciate it

You can certainly include child custody provisions in a Separation Agreement.

Helena M. Nevicosi
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm

4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.256.1665 direct fax

10925 David Taylor Drive, Suite 100
Charlotte, North Carolina 28262
704.644.2831 main voice
704.307.4595 main fax

1829 East Franklin Street, Bldg 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
919.321.0780 main phone
919.787.6668 main fax


The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.

I recently had a consultation with an attorney here in Fayetteville and was told I could not include children in a separation agreement as they were only for property not people. Although I believe this to incorrect I am not an attorney and would like to get conformation from someone who knows. If you could assist me with information regarding this matter I would be greatly appreciative. Also is there a way I could be provided with a sample separation form that includes division of Child Custody? or just provide me with the proper way to include this matter in a seperation agreement.
we(me and my ex)would be sharing custody week on week off, every other holiday. In the event one of us moved out of stae the custody would be every other year. Well if anyone could help I would be greatly appreciative.
Thank you for your response in advance