Child Visitation Order Modification


#1

I have a question concerning child visitation order modification.

I am a currently deployed service member that attempted to have my first visitation with my infant son as per out custody agreement in route to my state-side deployment. My wife (who must live with her parents until she gets a phyc eval as per the court order due to her threatening to not feed our child in order to force me to come home and make her meals and care for the child during working hours. I have audio recordings of these threats and others too) refused to allow me to have any time with or see my son. I was to have him from the Friday before spring break to the Sunday concluding spring break . Her excuse was the court order says “spring break/Easter” so that means that I can only have visitation with my son when Easter is during the school’s spring break holiday “as per North Carolina statutes”. I have not found anything in the general statutes to support this.

She also claims that because our son is not in school that all parts of the order that state visitation “as determined by the school schedule in the school district in which the child resides” do not apply until he is of school age. At the end of my leave to see my son before I deployed she offered me to see my son but only if I go to her parents house alone. I turned this down because I feel I should have had my son with me during this time as per the court order, being alone with her at her parents house simply feels like a trap, and in order to get her to agree to a phyc eval I offered to have one done. And until mine is complete all of my visitation is to be supervised by my parents thus one or both of my parents would need to attend. Due to a impending deployment (the one I am currently on) I have not been able to finish mine yet.

She also has told me her family took the gifts that my parents gave our son for St Patrick’s day and gave them to a thrift store. This was because they were “crap” and so her mother could get a discount on the things she bought at the thrift store for my wife’s adopted siblings. The store will discount your purchases if you donate something to them. In this case the gifts from my parents to my son were the donation. I have text messages and phone recordings to prove everything I have stated.

I am current on my child support, and when her lawyer unexpectedly passed away after the mediation I had my lawyer finish up the coversheet so that I could start paying my child support. Because of this my first child support payment was late (not on the first of the month) as I tried to figure out why I could not pay my child support (I had no MPI number). I was told by the North Carolina Child Support Enforcement that so long as I paid before the end of the month I would be good to go. I am now currently a half a months ahead on my child support. However, she is now trying to use this against me, and going so far as to have an attorney (paid for by her father due to her refusal to work) in Colorado send me a letter (scanned copy via email) stating that there will be legal action taken against me if I do not pay on the 1st of may for being late in March and splitting the April payment into two payments. She has also demanded that I ONLY pay my child support in full on the first of the month and that I am not allowed to pay any of it early. I.E: if I am paid in full for the month I am not allowed to pay any of the next month’s on the 15th. Again I have text messages from her to prove this.

So my question is this, due to my wife’s actions do I have grounds to change the child custody? I feel due to these and other reasons that my wife with the assistance of her family is trying to alienate me and my family from my son. I also feel that she is using our son solely to control me into doing what she wants with no regard to our son’s needs.


#2

More info:

I agreed to having my son stay with my wife and her parents until she got a phyc eval so that they could assist in having her comply with the court order. She is permanently (and always has been) wheelchair bound. She refuses to drive or work and her parents take my son to all doctors’ appointments and take her shopping when he needs food or cloths. They have in fact helped to to keep my son from me.


#3

Your ex is incorrect, it is clear that she is in contempt of the order, and the language regarding the school schedule, is a way to determine custodial swaps, regardless of whether or not the child is of school age.

I suggest you ignore her demands regarding support. So long as you are current with the State, and paying according to the order, you are doing what you need to do.

Your recourse for her failure to allow visitation is to file a motion for contempt based on her refusal to follow the order. All of her inappropriate behavior should be used proceeding forward with permanent custody as well, after both of your evaluations have been completed.