Dating during separation

Dating yes, sex no. Doesn’t mean that it doesn’t happen…but still sex with someone other than your spouse, even during separation, is illegal.

Dear ncpatrick:

Greetings. Yes, BOTH dating and sex with your stbx (soon to be ex) are legal. Why would sex with your husband/wife, even if you are separated not be legal? Let me put it another way - the separation period of one year was put in by statute for a number of reasons but one of them is in the hopes of reconciliation. If you have sex and date, you are more likely to reconcile so neither would be illegal.

Another interesting set of questions are - are we deeme “reconciled” if we have sex? Does sex after separation stop the legal separation? However, I am sure that is answered elsewhere on the forum.

Good luck with your reconciliation.

Janet L. Gemmell
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm
Board Certified Family Law Specialist

Rosen Law Firm
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, NC 27607
919.256.1531 direct
919.256.1665 fax
www.rosen.com

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.

I believe that one of us is reading this wrong. ncpatrick is asking about dating/sex NOT with the stbx…

Yes, that is how I read it. dating/sex with someone other than the stbx.

The answer is exactly as stepmother said.

If you have a problem stbx, dating can be problematic also. If you have a separation agreement that states you can associate with whoever you want to associate with then the platonic dating thing is not an issue. Lets say you date someone and your stbx has the resources to hire a private detective. He sees you go in a restaurant, to a movie, kiss good night and go home. What can they do? They (your stbx) signed an agreement stating that you could associate with whom ever you wanted to. If on the other hand, instead of kissing good night you went into their house then the stbx could say that you met this person before the date of separation and sue them for AofA. May not be true, but you still have a mess on your hands. Other complications can occur. Will they? Who knows.

This question does not have a clear cut answer. You can date during the separation period, however, if alimony is an issue you may create the appearance that you have been involved with this person prior to the date of separation. You should also be aware that sex with someone other than your spouse is a criminal offense.

P.S. Please feel free to bring up this or any other topic on our live call-in show every Wednesday at 11:00 a.m. EST. Visit radio.rosen.com/live for details

Helena M. Nevicosi
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm

4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.787.6361 main fax

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Charlotte, NC 28262
Main Phone: (704)307.4600
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Chapel Hill, NC 27514
(919) 321.0780

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service only, a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action. The information posted on this forum is available for public viewing and is not intended to create an attorney client relationship with any individual. These answers are provided for informational purposes only, a person should consult with their own individual legal counsel before taking any action that could affect their legal rights or obligations.

Is dating/sex not with my stbx legal during the separation period?