Divorce from bed & board

It is my understanding that there are 6 reasons why someone can be divorced from bed & board - one of those reasons is adultery.

I had an affair over a year ago. My wife found out about it. The affair ended shortly thereafter. My wife and I have had problems for many, many years and have been seeing marriage counselors for over 6 years with no improvement. Having an affair was wrong and I very much regret that I chose that path. Since then, my wife and I have continued to see our marriage counselor with no improvement and I think it is best that we proceed with a divorce. My wife has told me, the marriage counselor and several friends that she has forgiven me for having an affair. If she says she forgives me for the affair, legally can still use this (adultery) as a reason for divorce from bed & board?


She can use it for Divorce from Bed And Board but all it does is bar alimony.

According to the Rosen.com website concerning Divorce from Bed and Board, the potential impact to me from a succesful action are quite severe:

“the spouse who prevails in a divorce from bed and board action retains many rights. These rights include the right to sell marital real and personal property without the accused spouse’s consent, to inherit from the accused spouse, to take an elective share in the accused spouse’s estate, to claim homestead rights, to claim a year’s allowance in the accused spouse’s personal property, and to dissent from the accused spouse’s will.”

and also:

“As an action seeking a judicially authorized separation, an action for divorce from bed and board is seen by North Carolina courts as an appropriate vehicle for awarding exclusive possession of the marital home.”

So, my question is really if my wife has told me and others (friends & Marriage Counselor) that she has forgiven me for an affair that happened over a year ago, is she still able to take this action against me? I have been 100% commited to working on our marriage in the past year, paid thousands of dollars for counseling to no avail.

Is there such thing as a legal definition of forgiveness?