ED and medical expenses


#1

First a little background: I was divorced in 2001. My ex is now unemployed (since May). She recently took me back to court for a child support modification where she lied about several things to try to get more money. In the end my CS was raised by $6.31 per week. My ex has always been very “money hungry” but even more so now that she is out of work.
So I have two questions:

  1. In 2001, we had a ED worked out by our lawyers. Basically she kept everything we owned minus my truck and my retirement. I was also suppose to pay her $2200 within 90 day. A week or so after this was filed, I found out she had lied on the ED about amount due on bills and bills she had paid, etc. Rather than go back through court, which neither one of us could afford, we worked out an agreement between us. Based on the new info she actually owed me $685. I agreed to forgo this just to be done with her. We drew up an agreement between us and both signed it and had it notarized that said she kept what she had, I kept my truck and retirement, and no one owed anyone any money. Now 8 years later she is saying since it was never filed in court I still owe her $2200. Is there a time limit on this and are the papers we had drawn up enough to override the court document?
    2.In my divorce papers, it states I am to be involved in all medical, school, and dental decisions concerning our daughter. Needless to say this never happens. In Jan 2006, the child had cosmetic surgery on her ears. I was never told about this beforehand. In fact I did not find out she even had the surgery until that summer when I picked her up for her summer visitation. (I live in FL, they live in NC so WE do summer and holiday visitation mainly). It was never mentioned to me on the phone or anything. Well not 3 1/2 years later mom is saying she wants half of the money for this surgery. I am responsible for half of all medical bills but since I was never told about it and it is now 3 1/2 years later am I still responsible?
    It is like I said, Mom is looking for any way to get money out of me at this point. I feel bad that she is out of work but I cannot afford to support her too. SHe has not even been looking for a job. She believes she can only work in a “perfect” job. I work an average of 70 hours per week and my current wife works full time to afford what we have and to give to our daughter. I also pay for all of my first daughter’s extracurricular activities, braces and pay almost $600 per month in CS. Any help is greatly appreciated.

#2

If you and your spouse agreed to modify the equitable distribution order by agreement the court should enforce the agreement as written.
As for the surgery, you can file a motion for contempt to hold your ex accountable for making a unilateral decision regarding the surgery. I don’t believe a judge would require you to pay for the surgery as it was elective, you did not consent or even know about it, and the passage of time since the surgery gives an inference that your ex did not ask you for the funds in order to conceal the fact that she arranged the surgery.