Dear Selk,

Sorry to hear about your troubles, it certainly sounds like you are going through a very difficult time right now.

The easiest solution to your problem would be to ask him to leave and see if he will comply. Once he has moved out of the residence you can legally change the locks and refuse him reentry to the residence.

If he refuses to leave the residence you can initiate an action for a Divorce from Bed and Board. In this action you ask the court to order your spouse to leave the residence. Based on his behavior you may be able to get a divorce from bed and board. However, litigation is an expensive process. If he refuses to leave on his own I would consult with an attorney and have them make a formal request, before initiating any legal action. Good Luck.

Helena M. Nevicosi
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm

4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.256.1665 direct fax

10925 David Taylor Drive, Suite 100
Charlotte, North Carolina 28262
704.644.2831 main voice
704.307.4595 main fax

1829 East Franklin Street, Bldg 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
919.321.0780 main phone
919.787.6668 main fax


The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.


I have been married for 12 years and I am tired, mentally and physically. We have actually had 1 good year of marriage. I have put with his mishandling of money, (taking mortgage and spending,etc), writing me bad checks for bills,unemployement, adultery(even when unemployed),verbal abuse,legal issues that have given him a record keeping him from jobs, drugs, DWI,etc. I put him out earlier this year but his begging made me feel sorry for him. I don’t even love this man anymore. Just last week, he wrote me a bad check for his part of the mortgage and it bounced,making my account become overdrawn a couple hundred dollars because of his bad money management. How do I get this man out of my house so I can start the process for divorce?