Husband wants it all

Hi, I am new here. I just broke up with my husband a month ago telling him I want a divorce because of the misery I’m in being in this stepfamily life. I am leaving him because of his 15 year old son. Long story short, it has been over a month since I said to him I want a divorce and he said yes. We are still living in the same house as we have a mortgage in both our names. He asked if I’m okay with him refinancing it to his name and I said yes! Because I felt that that was the fastest way to move out. Here is the catch:

  1. He says I am not getting any equity, profit whatever from this house. We bought the house in 2011. His reason was since I was the one living, I should consider myself as a renter for the past 6 years, I get nothing once I move out. And also, he had to come up with 15,000 to refinance the house (I saw all pre-closing docs and nothing shows there he had to pay 15k!)
  2. He still owes 11,000 from his 401k for a loan we took when we bought the house. To pay for my share of this loan, I need to give him the title of my 2012 Honda once it’s paid off next year.
  3. There is another car that is both in our names, this one has a bigger loan because we just bought it last year. He says he will not take my name off the loan because he will have to come up with money to refinance it. So basically, the bank can still go after in the even he fails any payment.

If I don’t give him all of that, he will not refinance the house. I will be stuck here. I’m meeting with a lawyer tomorrow to tell him all those. I don’t know what my options are. THanks!

Marital property (assets acquired during the marriage, except for inheritances) and marital debt (debt incurred during the marriage for a marital purpose) are subject to being divided in equitable distribution. Typically that means an equal distribution unless equal is not equitable under the circumstances.

This is done by creating a balance sheet that includes the values of the marital property and marital debt and distributing each item to Husband and Wife so that the end result is an equal (or equitable) distribution of all marital property and marital debt.

What your husband has proposed is not equitable based on the information you’ve provided. The equity in the home is subject to being divided, as well as all equity in vehicles and the debt/loans associated with the vehicles.


Anna Ayscue

Attorney with Rosen Law Firm Cary • Chapel Hill • Durham • Raleigh • Wake Forest

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