I thought I was trapped!


#1

Can you please tell me what my rights are? I have been married for over 25 yrs. with one minor child still at home. I have no income and have had no career at all left because of staying at home raising the kids and doing EVERYTHING in the house. He has furthured his education and career. I have wanted to have him or me leave in the past many times, because of his misconduct. But I was so nieve. He always threatened that I would not be able to support myself and the kids, so I really believed that I was TRAPPED. I am so sure that when I tell him that I want a separation, he will ask me where I am going to go with my child and how I will pay for it! He likes to use intimidation tactics! I am willing to move, but have no income and I am sure it would be WRONG and much more HARMFUL to uproot our school aged child from everything that has been stable for the child’s entire life. The home, the room, the friends, the school,the backyard and so on. What can I possibly do to make him be the one to move? From the research that I have tried to arm myself with so far, I’m pretty sure he will have to pay alimony and of course child support. Is there anyway for me to get him out so that my child and I can remain in the family home? Thanks for any help that you can give me. I feel like I have paid my dues and that there must be something in the legal system that is there for my protection.


#2

You cannot seek to remove your husband from the home unless he has engaged in some form of marital misconduct as described in the statutes.Marital fault in North Carolina is enumerated in the new statute as follows: 1. Illicit sexual behavior (meaning “acts of sexual or deviate sexual intercourse, deviate sexual acts, or sexual acts defined in G.S. 14-27.1(4), voluntarily engage in by a spouse with someone other than the other spouse”). 2. Involuntary separation of the spouses in consequence of a criminal act committed prior to the proceeding in which alimony is sought. 3. Abandonment. 4. Malicious turning out of doors. 5. Cruel or barbarous treatment endangering the life of the other spouse. 6. Such indignities as to render the condition of the other spouse intolerable and life burdensome. 7. Reckless spending of the income of either party, or the destruction, waste, diversion or concealment of assets. 8. Excessive use of alcohol or drugs so as to render the condition of the other spouse intolerable and life burdensome. 9. Willful failure to provide necessary subsistence according to one’s means and condition so as to render the condition of the other spouse intolerable and life burdensome.

If you can prove that he has engaged in misconduct you may file an action for what is called divorce from bed and board, which is essentially a claim seeking the court to order a separation, and to remove him from the home.

If he has not engaged in martial misconduct you will have to leave the home and file suit for Equitable Distribution, PSS, Alimony, Child Custody, Child Support and Attorney’s Fees. You may seek an interim distribution of property to seek that possession of the home be awarded to you during the pendency of the action.