She is wrong. Anything aquired during the marriage and debts/assets held jointly are subject to equitable distribution. There is no such thing as a ‘legal separation’ in NC. The separation is simply a binding agreement spelling out financial, child support and visitation issues.
If you and she charged $5000.00 on credit cards, then technically she is liable for 1/2 that debt. If you bought a house during the marriage, then you’re both due 1/2 the equity.
Leaving the marriage does not equal no financial responsibilities.