Looking for the next step


I am leaving my husband of 14 1/2 years. He has had numerous affairs and had one about 3 months ago. We still live together. I am leaving at the end of February due to affair he had 3 months ago. We have not slept together sense October. I don’t want it to look like I abandoned him. I want a legal separation. What steps do I need to take.


You can either first separate and then negotiate the terms of the separation (property division, alimony/postseparation support, and if applicable, child custody and child support), or you can negotiate the terms before a separation and have them included in a separation agreement. This decision is usually personal preference and/or depends on the circumstances surrounding your individual situation.

You cannot be considered to have abandoned your spouse if you are justified in leaving the marriage. You are justified in leaving the marriage if you cannot continue the marital relationship with safety, health, and self-respect, assuming you have not condoned the affair.

The only requirement in NC for spouses to separate is that they live in separate residences. There is no document you have to sign and nothing to be filed at the courthouse.

Anna Ayscue

Attorney with Rosen Law Firm Cary • Chapel Hill • Durham • Raleigh

Rosen Online | Unlimited confidential access to a North Carolina attorney for $199/mo - click here

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service only, a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action. The information posted on this forum is available for public viewing and is not intended to create an attorney client relationship with any individual. These answers are provided for informational purposes only, a person should consult with their own individual legal counsel before taking any action that could affect their legal rights or obligations.