Modifying a new order

North Carolina Divorce Law Divorce and Separation Answers
1

Since our mediated agreement several things have come up between Dad and I and I am wondering if I can request a modification of such a new order to address these issues?

  1. Vacations are agreed as 3 weeks each nonconsecutive to include our weekend no longer then 7 days.
    Well I have only been able to choose 1 week in august and dad has all three weeks, one of which takes my weekend. Since he has a majority of the weekends for the summer a simple twist of the vacations would open it up for me, but dad refuses.

What would be the chances of requesting first, second or third pick or modifying the weekend visitation schedule for the summer to open up more chances of being able to get in everyones vacation weeks? The way the current order is worded it will also create a problem when our child enters school and vacations won’t be taken during school months. Which is also my problem now as I have an older child in school, therefore I am losing 2 weeks vacation every year.

2.Dad takes names and tag numbers of those around me or my home and says it is his right to know who I have around my child and he can do background checks on them, but yet he does not afford me the same right and lies as to where and who my child is around when with him.

How can I remedy this? I feel it is an invasion and while those around me have nothing to hide, it is annoying. Can I change the pick up to a public place halfway between homes? If so that raises another question. Dad’s child support is $200 less than the guidelines and he provide all transportation.

  1. Dad is constantly trying to drag my sitter into a conversation that disparages me and tries to get her to give him information as to what I am doing. He thinks he is building a case to go back to court seeking full custody again. I know that what he has will be the most he ever gets unless I am unfit.

  2. Different areas of the order are not significantly spelled out and with Dad it MUST be otherwise he makes his own rules for me and I am unable to enforce anything due to the vagueness.

I think I can do this alone as my attorney has been extremely busy, but I need to see if I can just have them draw up the request for modification or find someone who can?

2

A court order for custody cannot be modified unless a substantial change in circumstances occurs which affects the best interests of the children. It seems to me that your best course of action dealing with the unequal visitation in the summer would be to file a motion for judicial assistance to have a judge help you deal with your spouse in enforcing the amount of time you are entitled to in the summer. You may also ask the judge to reprimand your ex for harassing you in taking the tag numbers of guests in your home.