Oldest son


#1

First, if you are the same one who posted about having 5 children from a previous marriage and a 3 month old, I can understand why your son is disrespecting your current partner. He’s 12 years old and sees his step-father mistreating his mother, even if it’s emotional. Second, if you are that same person, this sounds like middle child syndrome. He is getting your attention. Last, almost every child has a problem with rules at one point or other. Since he’s going into his teenage years, it’s likely to get worse. I think it would be a good idea to get your son in to talk with someone for his anger issues and the past abuse. In my opinion, don’t argue with him, don’t chase after him. Let him know that you love him and that if he thinks something is unfair that he can talk to you about it but that you will not tolerate yelling and screaming, lying or running away from the issue. Set the standard for him. Make him aware that you are the parent and he has rules and guidelines just like everyone else in this world and that his life will go much smoother if he quits fighting authority.
I would not send him away because you feel you can’t control him. He needs stability not to be shipped off.
Just my opinion though, some others with teenagers may have a different view on this.


#2

My son is 12 yrs old. He has this temper that is driving me nuts. I have tried my best to find a way to work with him on this. He has come in between my relationships and they have been failing due to it. okay let me explain.

When my son was 1 1/2 months old his father lost it with him because he was a colic child. I came home from work one night and saw the whole thing on what his father did. As my son started getting older he was really getting it hard from his father ( which made us divorce besides him cheating and hitting/hurting me) Anyhow two years ago his father finally wanted to see him and his brother after 5 yrs. During that time frame he kept them from me and didn’t return them after visitation. ( long court battle) His father would still at this time of him being 10 yrs old treat him badly.

Okay back to my concern. Anyhow my son keep fighting and disrespecting the person i am with. I can’t understand that. I let him rodeo, do gaming shows, and play with his friends. But when he disrespects me or my partner it comes to a stop. He yells, says bad words, fights with his brother and sisters. I feel im at the end of my rope with him. I have called his father and asked him to start showing that he loves him and not hurt him but his father says its my fault that he is this way. I can’t understand that. I never beat him or hurt him in anyway. )well except for grounding him)

My son tends to run off when he doesn’t get his way. Why is that? Why does he leave the house and i have to go hunt him down. Why does he get so mad at my partner that he yells at him and disrespects him? He evens has a problem with lieing as well. He likes to play us both. Why does my son have a problem with rules?

Please help me on this one. I really don’t know if it is because of his past that he has to act like this. I have even put him in young marines and have talked to his drill sgt on the matter and they try to talk to him but he gets so mad that it is even worse. He doesn’t want to go back to yound marines. His teachers even see how he acts at school and i don’t understand that. School he should be feeling safe.
Should i send him to his day if it seems like i can’t handle him. I try to make sure they follow rules but he gets mad at them. If anyone has advice please let me know.

rose tanner