On-line adultery and abandonment

Dear had_enough:

Greetings. First…you did the right thing. OF COURSE you were fine in stopping his behavior and not promoting it or watching to see what happens. What financial/spousal support issues do you have and how long were you married?

Janet L. Fritts
Attorney with Rosen Divorce
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.256.1665 direct fax

10925 David Taylor Drive, Suite 100
Charlotte, North Carolina 28262
704.644.2831 main voice
704.307.4595 main fax

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.

We have been married only 4 years (4 years too long) and he has recently gotten a job in which he makes about 3,000 a year more than I do. This is his fourth job in four years (due to two lay-offs and quitting one after a month) which is something I’m also worried about.

Dear had_enough:

Greetings again. It is unlikely with the small amount of difference in income that you will receive alimony. Yes, it will technically be abandonment, but that only matters for alimony, and since you make less and would be asking for alimony, it is not really a factor for you.

My suggestion is that you leave before he loses this job and you are left as the supporting spouse and have to pay him alimony. That would be one way you could avoid being taken advantage of. Thank you.

Janet L. Fritts
Attorney with Rosen Divorce
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.256.1665 direct fax

10925 David Taylor Drive, Suite 100
Charlotte, North Carolina 28262
704.644.2831 main voice
704.307.4595 main fax

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.

Thank you so much for the advice. I am trying to get all of my paperwork (financial) together before I leave which I found out is going to be a little more difficult than I had thought since he has everything locked up in a filing cabinet. I have since found out that he cannot do that so I am ordering another key to the filing cabinet. Anyway, thanks again for the advice. You do a great service here that you do not have to provide. I appreciate that.[8D]

Thanks has_enough. Good luck on getting the financial records! Keep us apprised on how things are going.

Janet L. Fritts
Attorney with Rosen Divorce
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.256.1665 direct fax

10925 David Taylor Drive, Suite 100
Charlotte, North Carolina 28262
704.644.2831 main voice
704.307.4595 main fax

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.

I caught my husband talking to a woman on-line as well as making plans to meet her. I stopped it before it could happen. Should I have done that? Should I have let it happen and then done something? Also, I am trying to get my husband to move out but he does not want to. Will it be considered abandonment if I leave him? How can I avoid being taken advantage of?