Parent Agreement for parents never married

My son father left after I told him I was pregnant and did not meet my son until after I served him with child support papers and we had a paternity test completed. He met our son for the first time when was a 6 months old, he is now a few months shy of being 2. There was no any legal agreement put into place , we have been doing everything via text. At the beginning of the year he sent me a schedule of the days we would get our son due to him also getting his other son who is a week younger than my son at the son time. The schedule he present me with is a legal binding contract court order for him and his other child’s mother. He has always picked up /drop off my son at my home except for occasions when we will agree to meet . He asked for a 1/2 of my child tax credit money but I did not give him it because I was told he is not entitled to any of it.My son lives with me and go to his other house roughly 90-95 days out of the year and I provide majority of his expense. His father does pay me child support & is court order to pay his medical/vision/dental insurance.
Once I denied his the money he changed the arrangement stating we must do all exchanges in a public area because he is not longer comfortable with coming to my home. The times that I was following are not longer confident for me since I have to meet him and he is not dropping my son off to my house with my family. I told him that the schedule would not work and presented him with a schedule and times that work based on my work schedule and tried to keep it as close to want he had as possible. He refuses to do anything other than want he wants, do I have to make my son go since there is no legal documentation? I offer him want my son and I were available to do and even alternatives but he will not agree to anything unless it is want his wants.

My schedule cut his out 1 or 2 every other month due to his schedule I believe but since he was worried about the child support number he will not agree to anything except the schedule for him and his other son which is not being respectful/considerate in regards to myself or our son.

Since there is no custody court order in place, you do not have to agree to any custodial/visitation time and there is no particular schedule you are required to follow. However, you should still make good faith attempts to work out reasonable time for your son’s father to have visitation because you do not want the father to accuse you of withholding the child.

Since you do not agree to his schedule and he does not agree to your schedule, then your best option is to file a child custody court action against the father. You will be required to attend a mediation session at no cost. In this mediation you and the father, with the help of a skilled mediator, may be able to work out a mutually agreeable schedule that takes into consideration both parents’ schedules and one that is in your son’s best interest.

If mediation is unsuccessful, then you can schedule your case for a court date. A judge will hear the evidence and the judge will decide the custody and visitation schedule for your son.

Anna Ayscue

Attorney with Rosen Law Firm Cary • Chapel Hill • Durham • Raleigh • Wake Forest

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