Please help - I have no idea how to proceed in this divorce


I live in North Carolina and have been served with the initial divorce papers by my husband. He is an electrical engineer and makes very good money, but I, however, barely make enough to cover my basic utilities and rent at the moment. He has hired an attorney, I cannot afford to hire one and none of the legal aid offices anywhere in my area handle divorce or separations and will not even give me any guidance as to where to turn. My husband still has a large amount of my property in what was our home and refuses to give it back. I chose to leave our marriage because he became addicted to prescription pain medication, refused to seek treatment for the addiction, became verbally abusive, and threatened me on more than one occasion, and when I told him I wanted to try a separation, he all but forced me out of our house. I was not working because I have several medical conditions that make working very difficult for me so he was the only income source between us. Right now he is paying me a very minimal monthly support which pays my rent but that’s about it. If I lose that support, I will most certainly be unable to pay rent and I have nowhere to go if I am evicted. I only have a few days left to file my answer or ask for an extension, but I have no idea how to do either of those things since I cannot find an attorney willing to speak to me without charging a consultation fee that I just cannot afford right now. Is there anything I can do to protect myself? Any advice would be greatly appreciated.


not an attorney

If you only have a few days left, I would suggest filing a response to it before your time runs out…especially if your stbx did not mention anything about equitable distribution because once that divorce is granted (and it will be whether you file a response or not), you will LOSE YOUR RIGHT TO ASK FOR IT. Even if you handwrite your response…it will be accepted. My ex hand-wrote many “motions”, and they were all addressed even though they were the most unprofessional things you’ve ever seen…they mainly need to have the case number, the names, the word “motion” or “response”, and then itemize anything you want to address. If you want to ask for equitable distribution of the assets, then you need to do it before your time is out!

Again, not an attorney…


I’m not an attorney either Chrissy, but your story touches me. Divorce is such a difficult thing to go through.
I would suggest trying to find an attorney that will take a small retainer, and work contingent.
If you have anything to prove the income of ex, the attorney will be much more motivated.
I personally took my 16000. diamond ring, for I had no money either.
No family to borrow from…
Not sure what county you are in, but if I can help you in any way, I would be happy to.
I’ve been through two divorces with Cluster B ex’s. No fun, but boy have I learned a lot!
Also on this forum, I think it’s 150.00? for their guidance. They have forms you can copy to
help you move along…
This forum has been a Godsend to me and it appears, many others.

God bless you and keep you strong. One day you will realize this works out for the good.
Who owns the home? Is it joint?
You need to file for post separation support, and not settle for his crumbs.
The judge will determine what he pays. Not him. Get moving girl! This is serious stuff!
Depending on how long you were married, you may be entitled to half.
Your disability or medical condition should also be considered in alimony.
Lots to learn, and one thing I have learned that is very important…
No one is truly going to look out for YOU but YOU!!!

Remember, you’re stronger than you even realize. Forum members will help you too.
So sorry for your circumstances and will keep you in my prayers.