Previous agreement that expired was kids reside with plaintiff…dad Sunday night thru Friday afternoon. Then kids were with defendant Friday afternoon till Sunday night of every week. Me, the defendant…mom, had the kids except for 5 days all last summer, I now get them from school on Thursday, take them in and pick them up Friday, have them all weekend every weekend and then take them into school on Monday morning. They spend the rest of the time at their dads house. During this school year I have been the only one to attend any of their parent teacher and iep conferences. Dad was notified both by the school and me and never showed up. I have been involved in all extracurricular activities they participate in, dad has not been. Often on thursdays we spend most of the afternoon completing homework and class make up work they were supposed to have done at their dads that did not get done. He will not help them with any homework or projects even when he knows they are due that week and leaves me scrambling to get things done at the last minute. Also, while the kids are with him, they often do not take a bath or shower or even have their hair brushed. So they go from Sunday night till Thursday night with no bath. When I pick them up from school they look filthy, hair is greasy, knotted, and they smell bad. Also, since my ex lives in granville and I live in durham county I have asked him to please get the kids medicaid reinstated. He has refused saying its not his problem, he doesn’t have the time, and doesn’t feel like it. Anytime the girls have gone to the doctor that expense has been out of pocket for me, and they really need their medicaid! Nor does their dad really feed them, they get no breakfast with him and often have to make their own dinners, kids are all in elementary school. Plus dad has people the girls don’t know over to stay the night and has females he is having casual flings with around the girls and they don’t like it esp because a lot of those women will yell, scream, and even threaten my kids. Now, I have recently had 4 bedroom modular put up on my familys land in chatham county, there is family that live very nearby also. I want it so my girls can live with me primarily. Do Ihave a substantial change of circumstances in order to file for my girls? If so, where and how could Ifile? Would Istill have to file as the defendant? Given these circumstances, and I can prove them, do I stand a good chance of getting primary custody of my children? Its not doing the kids any good being with him and not taken care of. I believe they’d be better off with me near family in a nice home going to a closer school where they can get help they need.
I cannot give an analysis of whether you have a substantial change in circumstances based on a forum post, but your facts are certainly interesting enough to warrant the exploration of a motion to modify. You should have a consultation with an attorney in your area to discuss the facts in detail and determine if you should seek a change in child custody.
If you decide to file a motion, you will need to review your local rules for additional information on how to file, but it usually consists of filing the motion, noticing the hearing, and serving the opposing party.