Support and Housing

I’m preparing for legal separation and divorce. Trying to get everything I need together ahead of time. Like gathering my tools for a job before confronting my spouse with my decision.

My biggest concern is how I’ll do financially once we’re apart. I used to work but then got a chronic illness and had to go on Ss disability. I can’t live off of that. I HATE the idea of asking support from my spouse but I don’t think I have an option. We own a nice middle class home and middle class life. This is really the only reason I’ve stayed there s long. I’ll be beyond poor when we split. I’m only 55 and therefore have to plan for at least 35 years financially.

We’ve lived together in this house since 2001 both names on deed. We married in 2005. Engaged couple years before that.

We have decent savings and 401ks and IRAs both Roth and traditional.

Will I be able to get support? He makes a little over 100k. I make about 24,000 in SS.
How do I pursue getting it?

Secondly, who gets to stay in the house during the year separation? Can I still stay while he’s still paying most of bills?

Thank you so much.

Based on the information you provided, you will likely be entitled to alimony as long as you have not engaged in any marital misconduct. Alimony is awarded when there is a supporting spouse and a dependent spouse (the spouse who is actually and substantially dependent on the other spouse for his/her maintenance and support).

You can get alimony one of two ways: (1) by negotiating an amount and including this in a separation agreement, or (2) by filing a court action against your husband for alimony and any other claims you would have.

Which spouse moves out of the residence is usually by mutual agreement of the spouses. Sometimes married couples will choose to negotiate all the terms of a separation agreement prior to actually separating, and then one of them will move out contemporaneously with the execution of the separation agreement.

We offer two free Webinars, Divorce Legal and 50 Divorce Tips in 50 Minutes, that you may find very helpful as you begin your separation. These webinars will give you lots of information about the divorce process and they are presented multiple times a week.


Anna Ayscue

Attorney with Rosen Law Firm Cary • Chapel Hill • Durham • Raleigh • Wake Forest

Rosen Online | Unlimited confidential access to a North Carolina attorney for $199/mo - click here

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