When does Separation Begin

I separated from my husband on October 1, 2013. I have found an apartment for (6) months while he receives therapy; therapy that he has agreed upon based on possible reconciliation. He desperately wants me back and perhaps the separation along with weekly therapy will repair his issues and we can start a fresh new relationship. Serving him with separation papers would not be appropriate since we are working toward healing and possible reconciliation. He is behaving nicely allowing me this time apart.

Let say after (6) months I find there is no progress or I find I don’t want to go back to the marriage and seek divorce. Let say at that point I decide to serve him with a separation agreement. I know you have to be separated one year and one day to get a divorce; will the date of separation be October 1, 2013 or the date in which I serve him with separation papers.

Separation begins when the parties live separate and apart with the intent to remain separated for the purposes of divorce.

Not to ask the same question twice, but…

I left my home in NC to attempt to start a business in CA. The agreement with my spouse was for a 3-6 month attempt at the business. If it fails to launch, I would return in that time. I left in February 2012 for California. In May she told me she was having doubts about our marriage and in June told me she wants a divorce. I am currently represented and starting to go to court and my counter claim is being prepared. I have been stressing the “INTENT” element of establishing the separation date as June 2012. I am however being told that since I left the house in February, that is my separation date. The reason I am so concerned about this is that March 23, 2012 is my 10 year anniversary, establishing a “longterm marriage”. February puts me at 9 years and 11 months. I am seeking spousal support and am concerned if being under the 10 year mark will affect me, and if this “INTENT” element is actually written into law somewhere. If it is, where? I see it in your website’s info pages from Mr. Rosen but no law sited that says Intent must be established.

The intent of the parties will be determined by the judge based on the their individual testimony. If your spouse testifies that he/she formed the intent to separate when the physical separation occurred in February, this is usually sufficient to for the judge to rule that was the real separation date. The difference in the length of your marriage of one month should not have any significant bearing on your alimony claim.