Where to begin?

I would first take a look at what you can do about getting the home refinanced into his or their name. This should have been put into the agreement but it’s possible it wasn’t. If it wasn’t then you need to speak with them about it. If your name is on the mortgage you could get into real finacial trouble if they decided not to pay…
Then I would run the child support calculator on the home site and see if what you are paying is even in the right range. If not then you could look into modifying. I assume you file one of the children? You could look into modifying custody but as you said, you may be better off waiting until you have made some finacial changes. That needs to start with the home your ex is living in still with your name on it…

just a side note… In most cases the new husband’s (or wife) income does not factor into child support. As for her watching children in her home, if she has more than the legal ratio (when I was in daycare it was 1:4 in wake county for infants) then it is an illegal daycare. The ratios change for as children get older. Also, home daycares have a limit to how many can be watched in a home, Last I remember it was 5, that includes your own childern if they are below a cretain age. If you do attempt to adjust child support, you can request her tax returns to establish income. If she doesn’t claim the income from the daycare ( you have to be able to prove fraud) she can get into trouble with the IRS.

Custody and Child Support can both be changed upon a substantial change of circumstances. If you can prove to the court that the income of either party has changed or that there are circumstances that have changed that would warrant a change in custody, you can file Motion to Modify Custody or Child Support. I wish you the best of luck.

Helena M. Nevicosi
Attorney with Rosen Law Firm

4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.787.6668 main phone
919.787.6361 main fax

301 McCullough Drive
Suite 510
Charlotte, NC 28262
Main Voice: 704.307.4600
Main Fax: 704.943.0044

1829 East Franklin Street, Bldg 600
Chapel Hill, NC 27514
919.321.0780 main phone
919.787.6668 main fax

The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.

I have been divorced since October of 2006. I am very active and involved in the lives of my four daughters. Attending school events, coaching their youth soccer teams, attending school and rec league sports events, a night or two during the week to Dairy Queen, out to dinner, cook out or just spend time taking a walk through their neighborhood. My primary objective is to change the custody/visitation arrangement and have my children 50% of the time (one week on, one week off)

I feel like I got the short end of it when the separation/divorce papers were originally drafted. Unreimbursed work expenses coupled with what I feel is an unreasonable amount of child support; given the circumstances. My ex wife was remarried 3 weeks after the divorce was final (may have a case for alienation of affection and or criminal conversation). She and her new husband are living in the house with the mortgage loan in my name. He is divorced with no children and pays no child support or alimony and has a good job with the city of Raleigh. She watches children in the home for cash which she does not report or pay taxes on. He, however, claims three of my four children on his tax return. (I assume they filed “married filing joint”). They are in the process of building a rather large house. From the outside I would estimate around 3000 square feet. I, on the other hand, am currently living with my parents and struggling to make ends meet.

Again, my primary objective is to spend more time with my children but I realize I have to have a place of my own and be more self sufficient in order to make that happen.

What can I do?