To qualify for alimony in North Carolina, you must be able to show first, that you are a dependent spouse. If you are a dependent spouse, then you may be able to get post separation support on that basis alone. Evidence of marital misconduct will help you to get alimony, but you will probably need more than the birthday cards. If you believe your husband is still seeing someone, I suggest you start collecting old credit card statements, cell phone bills, etc., that may help you track his spending. Also, hiring a private investigator may be wise.
As far as the separation agreement, it does sound like you need one. As long as you and he agree on the terms, you can certainly put in terms that keep him from bothering you unnecessarily. In terms of custody, I would keep a calendar of the weekends that are supposed to be “his” right now. Everytime he doesn’t show up, or brings the kids back too soon, or calls to bug you about something unrelated during that time, make a log of those events. If your custody matter ends up in court, you have more proof of his actions.
Shonnese D. Stanback
The Rosen Law Firm
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 200
Raleigh, North Carolina 27607
919.256.1534 direct voice
919.256.1667 direct fax
919.787.6668 main voice
919.787.6361 main fax
The response posted above is based upon the limited factual information made available and is not intended as a full and complete response to the question. The only reliable manner to obtain complete and adequate legal advice is to consult with an attorney, fully explain your situation, and allow the attorney sufficient opportunity to research the applicable law and facts required to render an accurate opinion. The basic information provided above is intended as a public service but a full discussion with an attorney should be undertaken before taking any action.