I have joint legal (for all that is worth, which I have found out over time is not much) custody with my ex of our 15 year old daughter. My ex is theoretically re-locating here to NC next week, from NY. She is one week from being completely homeless, after living in a converted garage, with no kitchen facilities, for the last 9 months after being evicted for the SECOND time in 5 years last October.
We had verbal agreement that 15 yr old daughter was to return yesterday with me on Amtrak in advance of ex’s pending “re-location”, since I have a place here for my daughter with her own bedroom and her own bathroom (versus living in that 400 square foot house of horrors my ex has consigned her to for close to one year).
She refused me access to the child all weekend in NY–nothing new. She has done so frequently, and uses the child as her personal pawn, as so many women do in these situation, daring me to walk into a buzz saw, and financial black hole, of a family court system in NY.
She and her husband did make veiled reference or threat, of taking the child to Florida where he has a brother (they have been leeching off his sister in aforementioned rent free garage for 9 months, so now they may try to leech off his brother if his brother is dumb enough to let them do it). Our divorce paperwork clearly says either party must notify the other in writing before taking our daughter out of state.
At what point, if my ex, our daughter, and I are all living in the state of NC, does NC court system take over jurisdiction of this whole matter? As much as I want to brain my ex wife right now, if I wait another 7 days for them to get down here, my odds of winning in NC courts are much better than they ever were in the hopelessly female biased system up in NY. Not to mention legal fees are much lower here. After all, I can’t make a very good custodial father for my daughter, if I am forced to live in a cardboard box due to legal fees.
If they do not show up here in NC as they currently say they will, and if they take my daughter to Florida, or elsewhere, clearly without my consent, and consequently are forcing my daughter to live a homeless lifestyle out of a 1999 Volkswagen Jetta, at what point does that go from simply being a pain-in-the-backside breaching of a custody agreement, and rise to the level of endangering the child, or some other more “criminal” level of custodial interference or whatever it may be called?
By the way, I own that 1999 VW they are driving, and if they do not show up down here as they say they will next Monday, my inclination would be to report it stolen. I would do that right now, save for the fact that I want them out of NY and here in NC before I take that action, so my daughter doesn’t get stuck in that messed up child services system in NY.
To whatever extent answers, or advice, can be given here in this forum, it will be much appreciated. I clearly need, and will seek further legal counsel, but looking for these answers just to get an idea of how strong my case is and when, or if, NC courts take over if all three parties are living in NC.