If you are a good guy who wants to spend more time with your children and currently only have visitation - go for more custody. We went through 6 months of trying to negotiate, counseling and finally the lawyers were able to get the ex and my husband to reach a compromise that gives him more than the classic every other weekend. He now has 4 more days per month and more time over the summer and we hope to originally move into joint physical custody. Whether your ex is resistant because of control issues or money issues the important thing is being able to be more than the “Disneyland Dad” who only sees the kids on weekends. As far as the money, slightly more time will probably not reduce your support that dramatically but the kids will benefit. It was worth everything that we went through for my husband to hear his son’s bedtime prayers thanking God for “…more time with my Dad.”
Be sure and get joint LEGAL custody and alternating holidays!