Ex Spouse Reveals New BF after Sep Agreement is Signed but before Divorce

My spouse and I have been separated physically since last October 2016. We have a backdated separation agreement for the physical separation of March 2016. We finally finalized the separation agreement today. My children (3,9) have informed me that my spouse has a man staying with them. When I addressed it to my ex, she informed me that she is known him for a while even dating and that the children love him and he will be a part of the family. We just finalized a separation agreement so this all leads me to believe that she has been unfaithful and just waiting. My biggest concern was the fact that she told the children it was okay if they love him and even want to call him Dad one day. I find all of this disgusting and completely confusing for the girls but my ex is extremely selfish. I was curious if we just sign a separation agreement that has statements in there about not having overnight visitors unless you been dating for 3 months, does that start on the back dated dates or as the date of separation agreement. Is she in contempt? Can I file for alienation of affection or criminal conversation? I feel like my ex is going to manipulate the children and I just don’t know what to do. I want to get divorced but this coming to light has really thrown a wrench in the gears. Thank you.

Really need advice…

Most likely, the three month time period to date someone starts running when the parent actually starts dating that person, regardless of when the separation was or when the separation agreement was signed.

A person can only be in contempt of a court order. However, your wife is likely not in breach of the separation agreement if she has indeed been dating the person for three months, but this depends on the exact language of the separation agreement.

You can only file for alienation of affection or criminal conversation if your wife started seeing someone during the marriage, among other requirements. You will generally not have a claim for either if she started seeing someone after the date of separation.

Anna Ayscue

Attorney with Rosen Law Firm Cary • Chapel Hill • Durham • Raleigh • Wake Forest

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