Forced out


My wife and I were attempting to make ammends. She’s now changed her mind and has sought legal advice prior to my being able to retain legal counsel. Her counsel has recommended she have me move out, take my clothes and belongings, and we haven’t even filed any formal paperwork or separation agreemant.

I don’t want to jeopardize my position in the separation or be seen as abandoning home, but am trying to remain peaceful and keep the children out of a stressful environment. I have documented email proof she’s “forcing” me out and won’t allow me to stay at home and plans to change the locks per her counsel’s recommendation.

What implications exist if I do leave? Can she legally have me focibly removed if I refuse to leave?


If you leave you will no longer have access to the house, and thus may unintentionally limit your time with the children.

Your wife cannot force you to leave the home and you have just as much right to stay there as she does. I suggest you meet with an attorney of your own in the near future to ensure you have a plan in place prior to moving out.


Be careful. She might file a domestic violence (DV) complaint against you with or without real cause. You would then be forced out of your house by the cops, and have a very difficult double fight in your hands. Any arguments you may have had during your stay at home could be used a justification for DV. Sometimes friends or family members will recommend taking this course of action to your spouse. Some corrupt lawyers will recommend to do this, routinely, to their clients. Be aware that when going to a DV hearing you would not be on “friendly”, unbiased environment, those cases deal most of the time with mean, violent people, and judges will prefer to err on the side of caution than let a violent act occur. You may find it difficult to make a case regardless of real merit.

The initial DV hearing is “ex-Parte” meaning that your spouse can go by herself, make a statement that meets the requirement of the law, without any supporting evidence except her word, and have it entered. After that, you would find that the police shows up at your home and you are being kicked out. After that you are already in disadvantage.

DV is very much abused by malicious spouses, unfortunately, the system has been made to circumvent some of the constitutional guarantees we all expect to have, something that might be justified in certain cases (when dealing with violent people), but that can hurt innocent people if the system is abused.

I speak from personal experience btw. Of course, the standard disclaimer applies, YMMV (your mileage may vary).